Don't you see
you're the cause
of shattered dreams
of broken homes
of lives cut to short
you say its not your fault
you say you couldn't help it
you blame it on those around you
but your the one
with smoking gun
the one holding
the bottle to your lips
the one chasing
that last fix
that one last high
so you don't drown
when the darkness comes
calling from your soul
but you can't do it any more
you can't fight it any more
and its sucking you down
into sweet oblivion
Don't you see
Author notes
This one so isn't done, but I'm posting it because I don't think I'm going to get what I wanted out of it.
Comments
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good
This poem makes you think, is about somebody with a drinking problem, thats what I got from it anyway. It could probably do with just a bit more adding to it to make it more defined but its good as it is.
I love your poetry, I've missed it!
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Truth be told
and because I've never lied to you (as far as I know) its written to me, and anyone else who has dealt with addiction is one for or another...
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I don't know what you wanted out of it but I think you ended it at just the right place. Best here rather than say more than is required. Ending it here makes the poem. Don't you see?
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. . . . . . I don't care what you think, but you NEED to add to it. You had something going there and it just kind of cut off. It was great right until you cut off like that.
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