I was alone until he came
and made my heart beat faster still
The baggage toted was to blame
from loneliness that was surreal
I sought companionship each day
I was alone until he came
He wiped the stains from tears away
The baggage toted was to blame
He took my hand, stirring my soul
and made my heart beat faster still
A lone carnation made me whole
from loneliness that was surreal
Author notes
The form is called: "RenRhyme"
Go to Poetryality's Page to learn how to write the form:
http://allpoetry.com/poem/3370000
Comments
1 - 11 of 11
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An example of what truly beautiful poetry really is...I adore this write!!
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smiles arrive in that place where memories stir of my own...
and life shows one the journeys ahead and those we meet along the way.
Keep penning on one stroke at a time!
Bill
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Beautiful, deceptively simple but rich with thought and emotion. I will check out the form, the revolving lines remind me of a villanelle and the repetition emphasises with a lyrical quality. Good luck in the contest.
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Thank you for entering my contest.
So sweet! ^.^ Simple, but elegant. Classy.
Nicly done
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good job keep writing
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It's like you read my mind, Sis. Saying I can relate to this one is a gross understatement. I live it on the other side of the gender fence of course. Best of luck in the contest.
Sincerely,
Leo Long
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Wow, the luck one! Good work of art, i love rythme. The message is nice too. Keep this u
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RenRhyme huh...? I'll have to check that out.
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ooohh!
love this! Nice form definately wanna try it, beautiful story to go along with it! lots of luck in the contest my friend!
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This is so sweet,
truly very beautiful.
Sometimes when I reaad poetry
all I can say is that the words
are so pretty, like in this piece.
Plus I really like this style,
I am going to have to check it out.
Loveandblessings2u & yours always
Joyce
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I think this is soooo very beautiful, hon
Makes me think of my honey with the warmest thoughts
Wishing you the best of luck!!
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