Your requiem plays softly
in the shadowed halls of my sorrow,
as I stand beneath an azure sky
my eyes bleed carmine tears
painting my face a grotesque mask
of forsaken dreams.
How I yearn for your disease
to carry me into the harmony
of your enigmatic presence,
my soul flails blindly
where yours once tethered it
to reality.
My jaded hopes now fall prey
to a poison harlot who drags your
heart into malicious waste.
The sparkle of life drowned in
loathesom delusions, my mind
screams the agony of parting.
And I stare at the reflection
of my life, from a realm
seething with the angst of kindred souls
where solace is a memory
and sanctuary a bitter pill
swallowed by despair.
Author notes
Fantastic wordbank!
I used these words:
Azure•Carmine•disease•delusions•enigmatic•forsaken•grotesque• harmony• harlot• jaded•kindred•loathe• malicious•poison•
reflection•requiem•sparkle•tethered•waste•yearn•
A contest entry
- Lost in Darkness by Victoria of Aragon.
1050 points, ended August 20, 2008, 10 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Turn those greenies into Gold (or silver or bronze) pt 5 by whispernthedark.
660 points, ended September 20, 2008, 20 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Feel free to be as critical (or not) as you like...
Comments
-
You really made the most with that wordbank. Great write, thank you for entering the contest. Good luck.
♥
whisper
-
My dear poet, this is stunning! As mentioned blow, you have used the words beautifully so the flow does not sound forced. Wonderful job with that, because I tried to pick words that would intentionally mess up the flow.
This is a wonderfully dark poem, though I'm not sure if you intended it to be that way. Whether your did or not is of little importance, as the end effect is ... dazzling.
Though, I'm afraid I'm ranting right now. o o;; Thank you so very much for entering - my Muse is quite impressed.
-
Your requiem plays softly
in the shadowed halls of my sorrow,
as I stand beneath an azure sky
beautiful imagery.
you used the words well
it didnt sound forced
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