Jet lag wakes me for Netanya Sunrise
Wander into empty banquet room
Unwashed tables strewn with bone, pita bits, bitter herbs
Littered beer bottles with Hebrew letters
Swaying drapes, open window seat over the sea
Hushing of the surf
Where last night, first night
In tiny world corner where one can be Israeli
Surrounded by Dens of hostility
Wife and I stumble on a sandbar Bar-b-Que
Ice chests swept for seats
Salt water licking ankles
Lamb shiskabob and bottled beer
Grinning electricians from Jerusalem
Celebrating the waves, the wind, the fire, the sand
In the spirit of good will
Eager to make American friends
I really like these people
Who sing happy in a minor key
Not really alone in the first light
Feeling the pain of dreams around me
Grieving the ghosts of Lebanon
Every one touched this time
Troubling my thoughts
The sea, the stone, the sunrise
Hearing something faint in the distance
Rachel weeping for her children
Author notes
I've always had a deep fondness for the name Rachel. In the Bible, Jacob loved her, and was manipulated into working fourteen years to have her as wife. She died in childbirth bearing her second son, Benjamin.
Jeremiah 31:15-17; Matthew 2:18
http://www.trekearth.com/gallery/Middle_East/Israel/Central/Sharon/Netanya/
A contest entry
- Den of Hostility by Polaja.
1400 points, ended August 11, 2008, 10 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - god-forsaken is beautiful too by onerios13.
750 points, ended June 22, 38 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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I really like these people
Who sing happy in a minor key
I, too, hold a special fondness for the Jacob/Rachel story. And this poem was just as lovely and heartfelt as their saga. The ending was beautifully executed while the descriptions were wonderfully woven and shining with intricate threads.
A delight to read.
Thank you for entering.
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I find this poem even more poignant now with all the problems over there.
I have never been, I don't travel, but your imagery is excellent and your author notes sad.
Sue x
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A fascinating place Netanya is - first city to be designated in the newly established Israel, close to the Palistinian border, miles of beaches, and site of the Sergeants' Affair.
Your poem is lovely, evokes a timeless sadness. -
we just had friends from israel for a visit here in france ... they admired the peacefulness here, since fear seems to be the dominating emotion in the hearts of these souls who have known times that others prefer to forget ...
and, strangely, I felt a deep nostalgia when they told us about their kibutz and the simple life there ... working together, singing together, communicating with each other sincerely and without artifice ...
the gaze of their eyes was penetrating, going straight inside the core ...
it made me cry the tears they were never able to cry, the horrors of holocaust still present in every cell ...
and I was grateful that my warm, loving hug of complicity was not rejected ...
I have the heavy burden of being born in the country of the man that has brought a lot of suffering to their people ...
I feel so much love for the people of israel ...
marion (hannah)
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I thought this poem was beautiful
an abstracted take on the prompt and well written - the ending was the most powerful part of this poem, from the first couplet to the singular line ending - it was very emotive thank you for this entry and good luck in the contest!
Keep writing
Polly
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Beautiful wording, emotion and images in this! Just lovely! Like too many lines to list them all, but I think the ones that stood out the most are,
'I really like these people
Who sing happy in a minor key'
'Troubling my thoughts
The sea, the stone, the sunrise
Hearing something faint in the distance
Rachel weeping for her children '
Very well done!!
best wishes in your contest.
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Ah Benjamin ...
How well you write nostalgia ... and the soft sounds of the sea and sorrow in ancient hush ... Ah ... and I know how to sing happy in minor key. How well worded.
No I have never been to Israel. A woman I who so much wanted to go there, died there, of a heart attack, suddenly and without warning ... I thought: how apt.
She loved Jesus.
How can we read poetry without been linked to the deeper story of the poet? Thank you for sharing your sentiments about Rachel. How Jacob loved her! And how she must have yearned to be in the place of her sister ...
Perhaps, Deo Volente, I may see Jerusalem in this life, if not I shall see the New Jerusalem ...
Blessed be, friend.
Myra
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This is quite some poem. What more can I say?
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Rachael and Jacob, one of the finest stories in the bible. But don't forget Leah. She's part of the equation, and she deserves some kudos as well.
I think my favorite lines were:
Troubling my thoughts
The sea, the stone, the sunrise
Hearing something faint in the distance
and the last line is a given. Perfect.
Netanya...I must look this place up in my World of Man atlas..
Best,
Jin
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