The popular girls with the beehive hairdos
Sport short, plaid skirts, white blouses, and rose tattoos.
Sapphire specials at sixty-two cents each;
Giving their jaded hearts to boys on the beach;
And against lightposts at military camps.
Rings are not needed for these wonderland tramps.
If desiring a piece of mushroom-free tail,
Don’t go to down the beach to find one to nail.
Instead, you should pass by the ‘pay-for-screw’ life;
Settle down at home with kids and a good wife.
If you choose not to follow this sage advice
You’ll be providing a new home for pubic lice.
Author notes
Well ducky, let me know if this is too much adult content. I used sixteen of the seventeen words in the wordbank. I could not find a place in my poem for a hockey puck.
This is written as a piece of advice to my son as he leaves for military college.
In a list
A contest entry
- Word Bank Contest by Chanson belle.
550 points, ended August 11, 2008, 8 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Looking for favorites of my favorites by Paloszoo.
700 points, ended February 9, 38 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 28 of 28
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I really got a kick out of your AN. This is a silly write, I really enjoyed it! Thanks for entering my contest. It's a pleasure to read your work!
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I am glad you liked this poem. My son is doing very well in college. He got a kick out of it too.
Mike
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Superb
What's the difference between public lice, and private lice? A wonderful humorous write. You gave me quite the chuckle. Thanks for the laugh.
I re-read this tonite, and it reminded me of a speech in Hamlet, Act I, Scene 3:
(Polinius advice to Laertes)
http://www.google.com/search?sourceid=navclient&ie=UTF-8&rls=RNWO,RNWO:2008-24,RNWO:en&q=Hamlet%27s+advice+to+Laertes+%2D+Shakespeare
http://www.blinkx.com/video/polonius-advice-to-laertes-in-hamlet-act-1-scene-3/i3SIFepONMw1yztfBIzB4g
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Haha. Thanks for reading and commenting. When you mentioned public lice I immediately thought I had a typo in my poem. You had me going.
My son starts college on Sunday. -
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Methinks, I may have read it a bit quickly, yet it seems my comment may fit in with what you said, anywho! (lol)
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Wonderful
Very creative and so well expressed. Best of luck in the contest.
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Thanks. It was a bit of fun for a word bank.
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Good luck in the contest Mike. Wonderfully written with a very strong message but yet sense of humour. I do hope your son takes your advice and I hope all goes well for him in his new adventure.
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Thanks for reading. I enjoyed the chance to write this. It was a challenge to try to use all of the words in the word bank even though I didnt have to. The only one that I missed was Hockey puck. It did'nt fit the poem.
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Oh!! this is wonderful!! it rhymes and it's just all around cute!!! lol. You did a great job!! I really love this!! hat great advice
Good luck in the contest..
Angel
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I am glad you liked the poem. I have alot of fun with wordbanks. They get me to write about things that I normally would not.
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lol I'm sure Tom will enjoy reading this. You're a great dad, that much is obvious from knowing you. Good luck in the contest, it's a wonderful write.
Linda
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I read it to him. He got a kick out of it. I could not send him off to college without a word of advice. Hehe.
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Having a son doing the samething off to the military~
I had to crack up at your sage advise!
lmbo!
Great write!
~Lisa~
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Thank you for reading and commenting. I am glad you enjoyed the poem. He is enrolled in the cadet program and starts at Norwich University on August 17. The house will be empty without him.
I am very proud of all he has accomplished. -
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Yes~ I know mine was enrolled last year at a miltary acadomy, he did really well! I missed him alot!
Now he decided to make a career of it.
He enlisted in the Army and is now doing his training and AIT.
So i wont be seeing him for about 4 close to 5 months.
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wow you really used the words to make a good poem, no its not too much adult content, good advice for your son, hopefully he won't encounter any of the things you're telling him to avoid, thanks for entering (:
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Thank you. I am glad you enjoyed the poem. I never know what is going to come out of a word bank unitl I am done.
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Hahaha I love It, Subtle, yet not !
Your always surprising us with your talent
Best of luck with the contest my friend
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Oh my goodness
Yet it does have a lot of truth to it only lice is not the only danger today it sould be a first class ticket to aids or a lifetime of having an empty pocketbook
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There is much truth in your comment. He has a great girl friend, so this was as much about needling him as it was real advice.
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*chuckles* Great advice....and it rhymes!
Well done -
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Glad you enjoyed it. I still belong to the "isn't poetry supposed to rhyme" club. Thanks for reading and commenting.
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omg! this was terribly funny..and just like wow....great advice there 
i hope all goes well for your son.
keep wrtting and take care, i enjoyed this alot
Stephanie ♥
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I am glad you enjoyed the poem. I had fun writing it. I had been doing short dark stuff lately. This was a nice break from it.
He has a great girlfriend so this is more tongue-in-cheek than real advice. -
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aww i hope things work out for the two of them ^_^
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LMAO! Such sage advice! I think most kids from educated, caring families are starting to listen to their "old folks" words! I remember a friend who with several other students, while at CMU, invented a vend-a-fuck machine! FOR REAL! LOL Very clean, very private, and while they were in college kept in in the frat house and made lots of moolah. There were "girlie" movies, all types of advanced magazines like "Playboy, "esquire" hehe! Porn movies to watch in private and lots of soap and tissue to "clean up"! When the dean found out, it had to be disassembles, BUT I do believe he tried it out first! I may try this contest, but nothing I could write would be as creative and humorous as this.Now you know why I so love to read your poems.
Linda
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Thank you for your comments. I am glad you enjoyed the poem. I read it to him. He rolled his eyes, but I think he appreciated it.
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