I open eyes to feel moonlight again
solemn night, bared silence
that speaks above a din
music trapped within a bubble upon a sea so vast
struck from strings that gather worlds, folds of
darkest cold where eternities rise and swell.
Adrift, mere flotsam life
ripped from creation’s womb
and each moment is an age bounded by echoes
truths of a distant yesterday
lost within a shell
imperfect pasts rumble
like vacant storm clouds
minds wander to an end
faintest hints of horizon portend dusk
and dawn; we invent a Sun
mold mountains, lay in peaceful valleys
search to find someone to hold our fears
but we might only hear our heartbeats
such self important cacophony
cloistered within a soundless sea
where lasting love swirls upon stillness
and we need only reach …to touch forever.
In a list
A contest entry
- Poetry Inspired... by Mallig.
3000 points, ended August 17, 2008, 7 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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Such beautiful imagery and choices of phrase, I was really struck by “feel moonlight” and “search to find someone to hold our fears.” Powerful compilation of concepts, time, love, and mortality… great richness of meaning. Thanks for this wonderful entry!


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Beautiful poem! Great imagery. Excellent flow from micro "music trapped within a bubble" to macro "sea so vast" to supernal "struck from strings that gather worlds."
Then back to the realm of self-contemplation, "Adrift, mere flotsam life." Outstanding "each moment is an age bounded by echoes, truths of a distant yesterday lost within a shell."
Delightful descriptions of both the life within the conch(?) shell and the life that holds the empty shell to an ear to hear "imperfect pasts rumble" and let "minds wander to an end." The colors, of the shell are those of "dusk and dawn."
Does the invention of "a Sun/mold mountains, lay in peaceful valleys/search to find someone to hold our fears" refer to the imagination giving history to the shell?
Lovely concluding stanza, excellent "hear only our heartbeats...self-important cacophony cloistered within a soundless sea." Breath-catching "lasting love swirls upon stillness and we need only reach...to touch forever." Very nice alliteration, excellent use of vocabulary.
Thank you for your entry, and for sharing your thoughts and words. This was a delight to read.

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Loved the part of inventing sun!
So much to see here, so much shown in wonderful imageries and lovely thoughts as I read on first lines of second stanza. Another soothing verse penned by you.


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Strong beautiful metaphors, this is pure poetry
from your poetic spirit....excellent write
...
novy


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I like the idea of "such self-important cacophany". Interesting poem, 'Skid, and one I would like to re-read.


1 - 5 of 5





