Crimson Angels laid to rest
Upon a bed of stone
Glory bound a vision quest
To lead them far from home
True confessions plague their way
Their path leads to a curse
In the end they all fucked up
But it could have been much worse
Author notes
I used all the words in the word bank. Bosiarbooger
A contest entry
- " You Could Have Been The Real One" by Asabouros..
400 points, ended August 6, 2008, 5 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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Me likey
The way you have the title "fallen angels" repeated kinda annoys me though. I'm glad you used all the word bank words, but this seems kind of smashed together, though the idea of it is really nice.
Fave part:
"Crimson Angels laid to rest
upon a bed of stone"
Least Fave:
"Their path leads to a curse"
^ just seems a little...ordinary...though I can't really offer any suggestions.
ERROR!!!! (*screams all dramatically like in an old horror flick*)
"In the end they all fucked up"
...did you mean "they're all fucked up" ??
Over all very nice, I really do like the direction you took this in
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