OUR NAMES ARE ENGRAVED IN EVERLASTING STONE,
A TRIBUTE FOR ALL TO SEE.
ONCE MY JENNY CAME AND CRIED;
AND SAID SHE STILL LOVED ME.
THE YOUNG MAN SHE BROUGHT STOOD TALL AND STRAIGHT;
AND WAS A HANDSOME LOOKING LAD.
HE HELD HIS MOM---AND TOUCHED MY NAME;
AND SAID, " WISH I'D KNOWN YOU DAD."
I COULD NOT HEAR WHAT ELSE WAS SAID,
FOR THE BOMBS HAD STARTED TO FALL.
BUGLES BLEW AND IT WAS HAND TO HAND AGAIN,
INSIDE THE BIG BLACK WALL.
Author notes
This is a pre write but i had deleated it . Pic from "The Wall"
In a list
A contest entry
- Vietnam Big Points by BuriedTreasures.
6000 points, ended August 11, 2008, 12 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Top Two by ea.
400 points, ended August 3, 26 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Military Muse by condor.
4350 points, ended October 31, 27 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 33 of 33
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Well, congratulations ...
on a job well done. -
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Thank you sir.. Hope your feeling better today.
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Incredible. Very well done. I think you have captured something special with this poem.
Mike
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ah sweet one your heart is here , do so hope you are continuing your fight and are well . I think of you.
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Thank you . Loved your comment.
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Wow, this is amazing. I wish I could think of more to say, but it is already said.... That wall is heart wrenching... so many, so young lost
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We who survived are very lucky.
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Yes you are, and thank you! My b/f is a 3rd generation Veteran and his father was in Vietnam. He was in the first Gulf War...
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Sir, No words can echo the sentiments felt in this...
All I have left to do is... Salute...
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Some Salutes say it all.
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This is a very touching piece that reveals the pain and the agony of a family that has had so much taken from them. The wall holds so many names of so many souls who sacrificed themselves for us all and who will not be forgotten. This beautiful constructed piece was full of emotion and so much feeling in the words. The boy who has now grown and stands before the wall touching his fathers name, and the father lost in that wall forever living the battle. This is just so sad, but so exceptional that I will have to push this one straight to the finalist list. Thank you so much for entering and the very best in the contest.
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Thank you Lee. I guess all wars are the same. Just difrent places to fight, and difrent names to die.
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This is a touching, heartbreaking poem. A strongly felt piece of comemeration for one family, a strong reminder for thousands of others.
An excellent poem and I wish you best in the contest
Dee
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Thanks Dee
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As I have said before, I think this is a strong piece.
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This is so sad and so amazingly written...
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Thank you
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wow, this is very good. "Inside that big black wall" is a great metaphor.
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That wall holds not the names of children dead from birth defects like my daughter, it holds not the names of cancer ridden, slow death and dying.
That wall in all of its strength and honor does not hold the suicides or the families who have lived through hell. I am not friends with the wall it is for soldiers only not the likes of me.
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Well that tugs on the heart and brings a tear to the eye !!
You bring reality to the tragedy of loss and personal heartache of so many families !!
Your write honours them all.
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This is a beautifull but sad piece. A shame that so many kids never got to know their dads, and a damned shame that there had to be a seperation of a family. This was really touching. Last night i was listening to a song called, 'The Victors' It recited many names and ages of the men in the U.S. armed forces who were killed in the wars. It was so sad to listen to. You did a brilliant job with this piece and i congratulate you on such a great write.
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An interesting and intriquing composition.
Thank you for your entry. -
Heartfelt Tribute
This was such a beautiful tribute to the "Wall" So many children never know there dads because of war. Thank you for sharing once more, the heartbreak you and so many soldiers have gone through and still go through today defending the freedom of this great country and other nations of the world. Bless you my friend. God Bless our trops and Veterans
Always, Sandy
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There you go makeing me cry again, I loved this one!!
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I'm sorry aweet lady.. But I did too.
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PDG ...
which means ... pretty damned good. The meter's off, but who cares? It's readable, and the message is what's important anyway.
I can't imagine why you deleted it.
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I just pushed the wrong butten and deleated it..
I'm glad you liked it. -
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Don't you just hate it when that happens?
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Us old floks do that a lot. hehe
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Yeah.
Just think what would happen if McCain got his finger on that lethal red button.
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A sad but beautiful write. Your words touch the heart. I wish you all the luck in the contest. Well done.
Linda
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i love this.
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Thank you X
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