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A Tour Done

Went to the wall in Washington
I rubbed some names on paper with crayon.
Names of the men who were more than friends
they were my brothers.
        (Post traumatic flash back)
Got in country in 67
Ranger long recon patrol
humping through elephant grass.

Thinking of the world
Mom, Dad, Sister, Brother
Apple pie and the Yankees winning the pennant.

Walking through pungi stick, booby trap nightmares.

Call in an air strike
napalm dropped
Clear an L.Z
calling in a dust off
picking up wounded.

Hoping on the Huey skid
fly to Saigon.
Jump on the freedom bird
I am gone.

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 8 of 8

  • Sergeant Awesome
    January 26

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    My dad was in Nam. 1st Marine Division, infantry and howitzers. It was a sad war, with unneeded loss of life. Good poem.


  • quantumsurveyor
    August 28, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This so personal and idiomatic to the Vietnam war that I find it not possible to review the poem (huey skids, LZ, dust off - all alien to me I'm afraid).


  • Lost Emo
    August 20, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    wow this was great. written so well. the life of a soldier always stays with u even when u retire. war is something no man can forget. great write ^^ and gd luck in the contests


  • xCandieKissesx
    August 14, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Wow; this was such a beautifully penned poem.
    Full of meaning & depth & reality.

    Loved these lines

    "Call in an air strike
    napalm dropped
    Clear an L.Z
    calling in a dust off
    picking up wounded."

    Thanks for entering!


  • BuriedTreasures silver member
    August 11, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    An interesting composition.
    Thank you for your entry.


  • misticmoonlite gold member
    August 4, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    wow, this is so sad..life of a soldier or family member,is a harsh reality to experience, very sad but well written, good luck in this contest
    Linda


  • Fritz O skennick gold member
    August 3, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Hey Kevin, saw you here, had to check out your write...

    Great stuff...
    Great narrative, love the flash-back chattiness of the piece...
    Full of raw emotion that brings an extra element of visualisation to piece...
    Well done!!!
    Good luck in the contest,
    Take care,
    Fritz..........


  • righteousme
    August 2, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    MOVING AND REAL

    i love raw reads... and this is def. one of them... real but obscure enough to let the readers mind fill in the blanks... love it!!!!

1 - 8 of 8