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A busy Day

 

You have to concentrate to get things right

So go away and leave me to my work

I do not want distractions in my sight

You'll have to find another place to lurk

 

You think that all I do is play around

But really I've a lot I have to do

So please don't put me off or make a sound

This matters more than entertaining you

 

I'm writing all about a little boy

And where he likes to play and go to sleep

This bit's about the time he lost a toy

And that is just a picture of some sheep

 

I've finished now so Mummy come and look

Then I will let you read my favourite book

 

In a list

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 10 of 10

  • BellaD
    August 4, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    This is so sweet! Just love it. Congrats on the silver.


  • breedluv gold member
    August 4, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Love the point-of-view you used. Well done, and congrats on the silver.


  • Ceridwens Soul silver member
    August 4, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    A thoughtful sonnet from a child's POV, you relly got into the character here. Great write to the prompt.

    'You think that all I do is play around
    But really I've a lot I have to do
    So please don't put me off or make a sound
    This matters more than entertaining you'

    That's just what a child's eyes say when they are 'drawin'.

    Thank you for sharing with us

    Jem and Ju


  • Gwenevere
    August 2, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I think perhaps you write about the little boy that is still within you somewhere.Don't ever lose him, Ros


  • Mairi bheag gold member
    August 2, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I think this is the first time I have ever read a sonnet written as though from a child's point of view - and I mean in child-like terms. If anyone could do it, it would be you.


  • PassionsPromise gold member
    August 1, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Wonderfully done here.
    Wishingyou the best in
    the contest.

    Love the outlook...
    although I felt like I shouldnt
    message you anymore.


    Love
    Tory


  • Sue Cardwell gold member
    August 1, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Ah ... the innocence of children, don't you just love their way of thinking


  • Thomas Scott gold member
    August 1, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    Good stuff.

    A poem in short pants!

    Another splendid piece, Jeff.
    Good luck in the contest.


  • The Poetic Angel
    August 1, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Thankyou for your entry Good Luck


  • dame de la riviere
    August 1, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    The end kind of surprised me. The tone is witty and the rhyme is fast paced. It makes for an entertaining read. Peace

1 - 10 of 10