Let me rest by your side for a while
and savour the serenity,
that flows through your soul.
I sink into the silence,
as leaves fall like tears
into your lap,
rippling pulses across your brow.
Wrapping my thoughts together
into a basket labelled "on hold";
I follow your winding path,
gaining understanding along the way,
as to why we seem to constantly strive
for that which is beyond reach.
Unable to resist temptation,
I wander into your welcome embrace,
and release to the depths
of your cool waters,
the stains of existence.
Author notes
Prompt: Define a foreign word without searching for it's meaning.
My choice from list "kvinde". My definition of Kvinde = River.
In a list
A contest entry
- Define a foreign word – and use it as a prompt! by Beating.
300 points, ended August 14, 2008, 9 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Detailed critique welcome
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
-
"Unable to resist temptation" became such a powerful line, after understanding that you defined "kvinde" as "river". Somehow a river seems to represent temptation to me. Don't know why, but I liked how you put it into your poem.
When the contest has ended you'll see if your interpretation of the word is close to its actual meaning!
-
-
thank you for the lovely comment and the silver trophy, I feel this poem does manage to connect to the true meaning of "woman" also. awesome challenge idea for the contest, I had fun.
-
-
Kvinde, to wander into your embrace and cool waters. Let the stains of existence be washed away! TAke my tears that flow from my face and wash them clean. Inpsiring words. Great write. Think you nailed it! ~Sie
-
WOW! Impressive and creative from the choice of word! Beautiful in imagery and emotion that expresses so much from your heart!
Just lovely my friend!!!!
I too am bookmarking!
All my best to you in the contest
Jazzy
-
Oh my!
This is beautiful!
Such an enchanting piece leaving me in a sigh...
I love this one...Bookmarking...
Lynda
Adding your comment:
1 - 5 of 5
