there are issues to be discussed
from the desert of the intellect
the children have to be considered
school district feasibility
health plans and tax-deferred retirement accounts and proper nutrition
and everything else sacrificed to the false idol of lifespan -
frogs of the sweaty marsh croak and leap and are hooked
by careless fishermen
fat bastards drool beefgrease
and the crease in Dr. Wunderlich's trousers has flattened
humid and heavy as the unfortunate moth from the train window
train's a comin'
train's a carry me home
train's a comin'
train's a carry me home
you shut the fuck up
you and me sister
let's get to fucking and drinking and
shining like we're glad we're alive
`
A contest entry
- what makes you a poet? by Lute.
5200 points, ended January 1, 69 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 29 of 29
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Sometimes I read a poem I love so much that it renders me speechless. Like this one did.
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Damn!
I was doing a good job up until this point avoiding any contests you might be my rival in.
"and the crease in Dr. Wunderlich's trousers has flattened"
You crack me the hell up man, and I ain't even laughin'
Sigh~
Much Love & Respect
Renee
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in the photo, we are not the passengers, we are not the tracks or even the seductive rhythm of the approaching freighter; we are that blot of light that causes everything else to shadow or highlight, that makes tiny circles jump out of metal, illuminates wood until it sings like a fire, flattens out the background trees until they are watercolor blotches capable of shaping art.
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I see the light with clairvoyance! Believe me!
Renee
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i guess poets think many things trivial and none the less...speaking matter of fact...they may say things profound with a touch to their reality...and many do not seek fame...or notice...but to the few who dance to a tune of explicit words thoughts and feelings..could really give a shit about going along to get along...life is idealistic and what matters most is the moment...scorched on the pages of life..
bound with their skins
mal
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It really thins out, hastens - and that's without mention of any trains. Down a funnel; all moist and comely on through.
It seems like a redress, this diminuendo from the loquacious - or at least wordy - to the blithe and sensual. I like facing the divergence between the beginning and the end.
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This piece is of course just spot on with an ending that could be to the strains of "duelling banjos"
frogs of the sweaty marsh croak and leap and are hooked by careless fishermen fat bastards drool beefgrease
See the point is you simply don't write that unless you can
talented prick!
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Indeed. Naturally, a poet could give a fuck about a tax deferment plan and proper nutrition. I happen to know one who survives mostly on nicotine, coca cola and Cheerios -- with an occasional dinner of pimento stuffed green olives and when living large -- a Stouffer lasagna or a trip to the local Chinese Buffet.
trains. yes. the commuter train coming home from Boston is always poetic. all those bodies so close - and the books people read and their faces and of course the colors and shapes of the graffiti -- everyone not talking despite standing or sitting pore to pore.
and fucking is always of the utmost importance. creatively of course.
have you seen Dark Knight yet?
i have tomatoes and cukes.
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for the ones who had a notion
a notion deep inside
that it aint no sin go be glad your alive... -
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I wanna find one face
that ain't looking through me
I wanna find one place,
I wanna spit in the face of these badlands
I seem to have a thing for guys who read comic books. You know how some chicks like uniforms? I like super hero uniforms. and guys that read comic books. I wonder why that is?
Christian Bale is the best Batman and yes, Dead Heath as the Joker is quite something. I went to see it the day it opened at 9AM.
My cousin many years ago insisted I watch American Psycho which still disturbs me somewhat -- but I can't help but think of him singing and dancing to Hughy Lewis.
Laurel Canyon? Yes. I thought you hated ham? -
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Lisa, Vicki and I saw this film last night and quite frankly a film critic got the comment down - How could, when so many others have tried, Nolan get this so right. It is just a great film. I think they have learnt from marvel - you play it for real and everyone forgets they are in costume. They are either good or they are not - this one happens to be exceptional. Also having learnt from Marvel - I learnt to read on Marvel comics - that small window explains alot - and every relationship in Marvel is fucked with a capital "F". No easy shag in these cartoons let me tell you...the angst. By the way Bale has taken his character from "American Psycho" and worked out Bruce Wayne/batman in a blink - perfect. My youngest daughter saw it first in our family with the quote - "there are bits in it that will scare the shit out of you when you least expect it" "Darling, thanks for the heads up"
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ohmygod, you ever read "Watchmen"?
The best. If not, go read it. Now. -
I hate big fat flabby ham roasts, but I like lean thin sliced ham from the deli.
Well, I like other deli meats better, such as corned beef, roast beef, turkey, etc, but Mia likes ham, so we get ham. -
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Mia is in Charge. -
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whoah, woah woah woah badlands
woah woah woah woah badlands
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I have not seen Dark Knight yet, though I have read the comic books. Years and years ago.
I loved Batman Begins. I think it is one of my favorite movies ever. that psych doctor was a fabulous villain, as was the organized crime leader dude. And of course Christian Bale (or however you speel dat) is the best Batman ever. Big fan of his. Did you ever see that film in which he was the son of a record producer played by..by...Frances McDermond or McDermot or whatever her names is, you know, that chick from Fargo? Great film that.
I have to wait for the DVD to come out, because we can't really take Mia to see it. Chantel has seen it and she loves it.
I have a few tomatoes. Eating one right now on a ham sandwich. i think growing cucumbers is a waste of dirt space. What's so great about a cucumber? They're so plain and devoid of nutrition. But they are nice and firm and phallic. Even ribbed for her pleasure.
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I'd like to shine like I was glad I'm alive.
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In order to do so, I believe you must shave your bits.
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uh huh
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Oh Wise Mr. P...how many licks DOES it take to get to your center?
Wish I knew, then maybe I'd have hope that one day I might possess a pinkie of your enormous talent.
This blasted like a fat sugary whale. Cheers!
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several
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and this is what makes you a poet and why I read you and why I ain't entering lol
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God, you're hot.
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amen
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PS There is a glitzy advert at the bottom of this page that flashes very pinkly 'Pimped Space'.
Is it an entry? -
train.
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I wonder if some readers miss the brilliance of the rhyme in your poetry because you are so subtle with it.
I love train windows. I see poetry when I gaze out of them.
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Did you notice that i rhymed "home" with "home"?
trains are the very embodiment of poetry
trains and tacos
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you are a fucking poet ed, not just a poet that fucks... Dr. Wunderlich, damn that's good...
this is essentially existential and existentially essential,
you da bomb...
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