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souvenirs


seashells
sand in my shorts
vacation-red skin


A contest entry

Is it effective or boring?

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Comments


  • sailor ptolema
    August 3, 2008
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    I like the idea of this, coming back from vacation, and being as red as a lobster . But, I think this is a bit too broken up. I'd like to see the addition of definite and indefinite articles to make the flow more succinct .

    thanks for entering and g'luck.

    -sailor ptolema