You enjoyed cheating on me, don't hold your breath
You may run away, but try cheating on death
I'll cut your elegant eyelids off with razor blades, so you can see
All the pain, the hurt, the agony, that you did to me
I want to devour every ounce, of happiness that you bare
I want to take all your hope, and leave you in despair
Like a rusty barbed wire, I have the urge to unwind
I'll crawl through your body, shredding my barbs inside your intestine
I'm the hate machine, hate machine
Running through your soul
I'm the hate machine, hate machine
Gonna take your life, put you in a hole
I'm the hate machine, hate machine
Corrupting all of your dreams
I'm the hate machine, hate machine
I'll stay awake, so I can listen to all of your screams
I'll take your heart, eat it like an apple core
I won't stop there, I'm hungry for a bit more
I'll dig and tunnel, through your beautiful brain
Like a psychopathic parasite, slowly eating you insane
I want to be the disease, that eats your fine flesh away
The choke in your throat, that blocks your arid airway
I want to be the contorted cancer, that eats you alive
That amputates your soul, until the day that you die
I'm the hate machine, hate machine
Running through your soul
I'm the hate machine, hate machine
Gonna take your life, put you in a hole
I'm the hate machine, hate machine
Corrupting all of your dreams
I'm the hate machine, hate machine
I'll stay awake, so I can listen to all of your screams
I've had my fill, of your betrayal and deceitfulness
Your lonely life, now becoming almost empty and worthless
I wish you luck, while suffering in purgatory madness
Where you are surrounded, and completley blinded by blackness
Of all things that I want to be, is your reaper
Take you by your life, put it six feet deeper
I want to leave your body, de-membered and impaired
That's how you made me feel, the last time that I cared
I'm the hate machine, hate machine
Running through your soul
I'm the hate machine, hate machine
Gonna take your life, put you in a hole
I'm the hate machine, hate machine
Corrupting all of your dreams
I'm the hate machine, hate machine
I'll stay awake, so I can listen to all of your screams
Author notes
This is about a relationship with someone that cheated on me. (The Ex)
<<< Contest - Don't You, Forget About Me>>>
Option 6.
<<< Contest - Random options. by Shrat >>>
Option 4.
Pete the Parrot
<<< Contest - Blood And Murder by papercutangel86 >>>
Option 1.
A contest entry
- Don't You, Forget About Me by Poetic Obscenity.
550 points, ended August 6, 2008, 79 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - best prewrites by dory.
500 points, ended July 30, 2008, 89 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Make It Dark by peregrin.
450 points, ended August 10, 2008, 81 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Random options. by Shrat.
600 points, ended July 30, 2008, 14 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Come on Lovely Poets! Let Your Hatred Come Out With Cruel Passion by Leaving Today.
465 points, ended August 19, 2008, 19 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Give Me Dark by The.Tango.Emily.
600 points, ended July 31, 2008, 26 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Blood And Murder by Night Terrors.
300 points, ended August 3, 2008, 27 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - anything dark by XxemohatexX.
450 points, ended August 4, 2008, 9 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 28 of 28
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Sheesh, this is ridiculously good, I'm not even mad I lost to this
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Thanks
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wow this is the best thing i have read so far you can get away with being a little long because you didnt put me to sleep this had great imergy and you have a great chance at gold
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Thanks a lot doll
Glad I never put you to sleep 
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Wow talk about some hate. I love this song? I love how you said you would eat the bitch's heart out like an apple I love the rythme to this I think it would make one hell of a metal song. I love it I can just hear the throbing music and the screaming tourtured vocals. Thanks for this. Congrades your a finalist
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Thanks so much, very glad you enjoyed this. I appreciate you liking this ... it is a metal song I came up with. Metal is the air I breathe. Thanks for having me as a finalist.
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bravo!!!!!!!!!!!! wow you should read The Finale... one I wrote it goes one very well with yours nicely done babe!
love ya!
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Thanks My Love Villain! I'll check that out right now! Glad you enjoyed this piece ... there are spots that I still need to work some kinks out in this one..
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GOOD WORK DAVID!!!
Way to go on this one!!! Your rock with your latest effort! THANKS!!!
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Hey Pat, Wasn't sure if you were going to like this change I took ... I have to keep things balanced thou! Glad you enjoyed!
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I hate when guys cheat! Ugh, I want them all DEAD! They suck! So much emotions, but one thing I hated, it's soo long, and... it's really long. And I can't handle very long poems at points, and this is one of those points, but I still read it. Very nicely done. Next time, get your point across sooner, at least for me. But very nicely done, luck in the contest.
xXDCXx
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My writes are lyrical, just cut out the chorus hehe if you want the point quicker But glad you read it all! Thanks
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This brought a very sick smile to my face. Almost sounds like something you would find in a disturbed song. (Thats a good thing)
I really liked your rhyme, and just everything about this poem. It was choppy in places, but you made up for that with your language.
Great job! And thanks for entering! -
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I think I know which parts are choppy, I'll try to edit those parts out sometime. With proper pauses and breaks I think I can work out some kinks. Glad you enjoyed this thou.
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Ah, deep and emotional. Perfect, just what I want to read!
Good write, very real... I like that!
Good luck in the contest!
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Thanks! this was actualy fun to write
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-dances in raining blood-
Gorgasmic. This has slipped into the finalists list above all of your other entries for sure. It's absolutley hateful. Hate is passion..Just as much passion as love. Therefore just as intriguing and heartfelt. Very deep and a song, i hope to hear screamed some day. =]
"You enjoyed cheating on me, don't hold your breath
You may run away, but try cheating on death
I'll cut your elegant eyelids off with razor blades, so you can see
All the pain, the hurt, the agony, that you did to me"
Damn sexy. -
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mmmm Slayer - Raining Blood! great song!!! Thanks for not hating my "new change" in my writes haha! Much appreciated!
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Holy shit man, when you said its scary you weren't kidding.. :S:S:S:S rly good but holy shit.
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well .. i'm not that scary ... I like writing scary things hehe but glad you think it's really good! Much appreciated!
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WOW!! This is some dark and passionate, I can really see the hate you have for your ex. This is another amazing write and I love love love love all your poems there isnt one that doesn't have me begging for more. Always keep penning
♥always Kate
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hehe beg for more .. you are funny! Glad you enjoyed doll ... i'll Penn Penn Penn until my eyes go dry! Once angain, thanks for everything!
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wow wow wow!
rhyming was off the hook and it was overall an amazing piece! loved it so much, you've weaved your emotions into this piece perfectly fine!
keep penning!
AWESOME!
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I'm very glad that you liked this. I wrote it very very late last night, didn't think anyone would like it at all. That's the beauty of writing thou, write how you feel, good or bad, and let others appreciate it for what it is. Thanks so much, and again, glad you enjoyed this piece!
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wow that is great!!
my fav lines "I'm the hate machine, hate machine
I'll stay awake, so I can listen to all of your screams "
good rhymes! -
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Thank you so much! I'm glad you enjoy them, just as much as I enjoy writing them. I love contests where I can just open up and rev my inner engine! Once again, thanks for the comment and very much appreciate everything you have ever said about my writes!
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OK WOW this was so good i loved it....i love how u write i was like singing this more like screaming it (in my head of course) definetly could see this as being a hit song. You have some serious talent.
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thanks darlin' .. you do know .. I greatly appreciate all of your comments .. it's one of the reasons why i'm still writing Glad you enjoyed!
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