I awake at attention, needing to drain,
feeling uncomfortable, not in any pain.
Relief is evident, by my owners shudder and sigh,
a couple of shakes, I dribble on his thigh.
Into the refreshing shower, both of us go,
a little soap and a loofah, soon we both glow.
I hate when he confines me in those little white shorts,
I get claustrophobic, puts me quite out of sorts.
So I work my way around, snake out the leg hole,
tighty whities my ass, I'm the one in control.
He used to wear boxers the stupid shit,
I can't figure out why he decided to quit.
Loved the freedom that loose boxers bring,
he should not be restraining, his ding-a-ling.
I run this outfit, make all the decisions,
always win when there are conflicting visions.
But now and again he brings me out to play,
into that warm wetness, where I'd rather stay.
The feeling euphoric, I rise once more,
I'm fully in control now, can hear him roar.
It's so exciting, I always end up spewing,
then he puts me away, what IS he doing?
Author notes
Love you Tory.
In a list
A contest entry
- Rent-A-Muse by Dalaney.
1200 points, ended August 10, 2008, 14 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Make me smile, make me cry, make me horny. . . . Anything goes by Childofserenity.
500 points, ended August 23, 2008, 24 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 24 of 24
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lol Thank you for sharing, I always wondered what it was like for a guy...lol. This is a great write!
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lmfao wow..haha
"So I work my way around, snake out the leg hole,
tighty whities my ass, I'm the one in control"
Haha this was hilarious, I love how the penis is so controlling xD penis you little brat get down! xD Haha loved the write, made my day -
i think that poem made my day. i feel like i need to share that with a lot of ppl, its a very nice poem. thanks for entering.
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"a couple of shakes, I dribble on his thigh.
Into the refreshing shower, both of us go,
a little soap and a loofah, soon we both glow."
What a charismatic depiction of the day-to-day routine of living with a penis. I like how the soap and loofah line depicts both you and your member as border-line comical cartoon characters both smiling after a shower. If there ever needed to be a commercial advertising the perks of having a penis, this could be a good introduction. -
you are a nasty piece of work...u must worship your penis...seriuosly it very nice an like the creativity and use of imagery...
check some of my wor -
HA, Ha, ha
When in doubt, think with your head. LOL
Good one Scott.
Buddy
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I remember a joke about two twins in the womb who kept complaining about a bald-headed mouse who crept into their home and painted the ceiling. But it wasn't very funny either.
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had me going
this one was great i am browsing through and this is the best one yet
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Hahahahahahahahahahaha!!!
VERY niiiiice!!!!
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Ahah, this was hilarious. Great one
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LOL
I think this is wonderful. It made me smile as I was reading. It's funny, and so true from what I heard. Good luck!
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hahahahha! this is great, i laughed so much reading it.
xoxo- christina -
WELL DONE!! You got me laughing..
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Am not keen on the inclusion of the word sh*t but that's not a criticism simply a perspective. The poem made me smile for the poet nailed the fact that male genitalia have, indeed, a mind of their own. Loved the title.
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Hilarious personification. Like the rhyme.....and the narrator's attitude! "always win when there are conflicting visions" ahhh....my favorite line
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Nice... I liked it... I'd love to see more of your work. The rhyme is very good.
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this made me laugh, i know that was the point but i still felt i should state it.. great how you made it ryhme too
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AAHAHAHAHAH perfect! what a brilliant perception of the human penis got me giggling from the start the title grabbed me and i was hooked read this 3 times! excellent work extremely amusing
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Funny. You should add how MR. Penis has a best friend named Pussy and a neighbor named Ass.
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This was funny as hell. I've never thought about it like that... Thanks for sharing.
--Genesis. -
I liked this alot, it made me laugh.
Good write! -
What lovely personification! Well done, though I'm not sure to whom I should be addressing the comment - the narrator, or the poet?
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wonderful job and fits this contest to a T.
inmany ways.
Well pen and best wishes
Love
Tory
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