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Freeze Frame (Haiku)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

black on white,
clicked shutter-
dark movie screen












 

 

A contest entry

Critical Critique Desired.

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 5 of 5

  • sailor ptolema
    August 3, 2008

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    black on white,
    clicked shutter-
    dark movie screen
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    maybe for L3:

    a dark movie screen ..... I think the indefinite article makes it read more succinctly

    I like this a lot. I like that the image I see is in black and white . That's pretty cool i think.

    thanks for entering and g'luck

    -sailor ptolema


  • TyrannyForestFairy
    July 28, 2008

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    Simple and very creative with imagery and good description. Nice work!

    ~Emily~ xx


  • notorious gold member
    July 27, 2008

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    My favorite haiku of yours so far

    This is so clever & simple, exactly like a haiku oughta be...

    The clicked shutter thing is awesome!! "dark movie screen" was inevitably awesome.

    Awesome x infinity

1 - 5 of 5