Him, her,
Her, him
Tightly entwined
Becoming one
Slipping about
Silk sheets
Faster, slower
Fucking harder
She screams
He screams
Bodys
Stiffen...
She cums
He cums
A fast
Hard fuck!!!
A contest entry
- sex by Tangled Angle.
450 points, ended August 1, 2008, 8 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 11 of 11
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i completely agree with shirley. she is right.
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FAIR PLAY TO YOU, I KNOW SHE IS RIGHT BUT, I THINK YOU TWO ARE MISSING THE POINT, THE FACT THAT THE POEM IS LACKING EMOTION AND DESCRIPTION WAS MENT TO GIVE THE IMPRESSION OF EMOTIONLESS SEX, BUT EACH TO THEIR OWN AND THANK YOU FOR YOUR COMMENT
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I am not missing the point. There's just nothing poetic about this poem. It's more like a list of actions - sort of like a porn poem.
It is just my opinion.
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Obviously accurate, but I felt something lacking poetically. Good luck though,
Shirley -
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THANK YOU, ME TOO LOL
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Sex Indeed...
I liked it...It was quick and to the point. Left little to the imagination though...I felt like there should have been more...some emotion...But with a hard fuck there is no emotion just carnal urgency. Good write.
mandie
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THANK YOU Mandie, the nonexistance of emotion, was intentenal and the second half of your comment is spot on, thanks for commenting on so much of my work, its a pleassure thanks again john
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Well
It sounds much like todays world. Lets just fuck and enjoy the pleasure it brings. As one now ol;d I must say I have been there many times. But I never use the word love because of such desires. lol
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thank you bob, and your so right my friend thank you and take care
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whooppeee, beauty!
This is certainly expressive and vivid. Straight to the point and leaves the reader feeling WOW!
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thanks, it leaves me feeling wow! i know im young but if it lasts to long i begin to lose buff lol
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