We never left no matter how far we walked.
There's no escaping this; imprinted on our souls
And stillframes in our minds taped to mirrors and dashboards.
We never left and nor do we plan to anytime soon.
We will be immortalized in imprints on our souls
And stillframes in our minds taped to mirrors and dashboards.
I will not betray you and give you to time
I beg you share my loyalty and devotion
Cling to our memories when my arms are too far away.
Comments
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Kind of awkward. But in... a good way? If that makes sense. It's awkward in the way that I don't understand it. But that also intrigues me and makes me want to understand it. Now, since I don't understand it I can't really comment on how to make it better.
I suppose it would be better if you could keep all of the brilliant metaphors and wording here while still encompassing a practical manner that makes sense. If you could do that, I would be very proud. But it would be very difficult to do that without taking away from the intrigue of the poem, so you don't have to do that. I find this poem intriguing. Very well written. I'm sure I would enjoy it very much if I could understand it lol
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