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the end..

its come to the end
its time for me
to descend..

 

i lift my up my

blood filled top

as i watch the blood drop

 

get a knife and get ready

to end my life..

put it to my chest

then i say god please

put me to rest!

 

press it into my scarred

dry skin and wait for the

pain to settle in..

 

finally i get there

to my heart and ouch

i scream watch blood poor

i cant take this pain no not at all!

 

but i know now that I'm going

to a better place ..where my body will leave

a trace...

 

i got to the vessel in my rock

of a heart..

and i say why was i born in the start??

 

my soul lifts it self

out of my flesh ,my body

why I'm so sorry..

but I'm gone now my body is lost

why it looks so white all pale and glossed

 

soon when they find me i'll be in my grave

thinking of all the trouble i made

for being at home when i was alone

 

anyway I'm gone now finally

its happened to me i got what i wanted

well here's my last breath goodbye

 

my blood and gore

left on the floor for all

my family too look at and adore

with my lifeless body resting there

well i bet you don't bloody care!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Author notes

CONSTEST: OPTION 2

A contest entry

did you like my poem if so please comment...

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 22 of 22
  • I do feel the emotion, it is dark and grabs me as the reader. Thank you for entering my contest.

    ~~Kitten

  • It hurts to think you're family would be better off without you, and that they'd actually be happier. I felt this way a lot growing up, and I'm thankful I'm not there, in that every day. It will get better.


  • Abstract Image
    January 21

    Edit | Reply
    incredible wording here and it really speaks to you like a small chapter in a huge book. tiny and worthless...good luck.


  • ASmileForYou
    January 7

    Edit | Reply
    "my blood and gore

    left on the floor for all

    my family too look at and adore"

    Great choice of words! This was a very strong poem. I enjoyed reading it!

  • wow this was a great poem and a very sad poem i had no least favorite parts of this poem i loved it all i couldnt stop reading this poem keep on writing i hope all is well thank you for your entry i would not change this poem at all


  • BadazzGangsta
    December 23, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    omg...this made me cry some...its so sad ...i thot the sadest and most meanest part of this poem is this part my blood and gore... left on the floor for all...my family too look at and adore if that is wut your family would truly adore...that makes me sick...thats not right at all....im so sorry you go through such pain...i wish i could help

  • Abstract Image
    November 5, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    ooh nice poem you have written here...for about half of it i could swear it was a replica of on i had written called awaiting death but unlike mine, yours involves killing yourself...i love that...good luck.


  • Nitenovanavium
    October 13, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    wow, by no means are you short of supporters of your poetry. ^_^
    I'm a dark writer myself, although not quite the same as i used to be.
    This is a really cool poem! and you say you're only 12?!!! That's quite an achievement there hun! Well, i'm just gonna say this. Be very carefull with your rhythm in poems like this (rhyming ones) otherwise the rhymes don't seem like the roll together.
    I only sy this cos i think you're really good.

    *High five: dark poets for the win*


  • whispernthedark Greeters member
    October 4, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This is a very emotional and heart-felt poem. I thank you so much for entering the contest, good luck.


    whisper


  • Shuberth
    October 4, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    your poems are very emotional and sad...
    i can relate to this...

    "get knife and get ready

    to end my life..

    put it to my chest

    then i say god please

    put me to rest!

    press it into my scarred

    dry skin and wait for the

    pain to settle in..

    "


    NO I WONT DO THAT

    Your Special!

    Plese Stop Think Like That...


  • broken-angel
    September 23, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    loved this xxxx


  • FallenFromGrace1102
    September 16, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Awesome write, keep up the great work. i wish you the best of luck in my contest and thank you for entering this piece. I would apperacite it if you could put the stuff i asked for in your authors notes :]. I really liked the lines:

    "press it into my scarred
    dry skin and wait for the
    pain to settle in.."

    *~*bee*~*


  • Avatar of Innocence
    September 7, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Thank you very much for being patient with me, and entering my contest.

    Fourth stanza, first line: did you mean "scared" or "scarred"?


  • Walking Oxymoron gold member
    September 1, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    press it into my scared
    dry skin and wait for the
    pain to settle in..

    I liked that stanza,
    It resonated.

    I like that you appear to be so ready to 'do this thing' and yet will still admit you are scared by it.

    It's a shame also that you think people will not care about you if you go.

    You may have heard it before, but I care, and I don't even know you!


  • Imperfect Beauty
    September 1, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    wow! this is so well written and its amazing the perspective you have of others. "well i bet you don't bloody care" wow... i'm sure there'slots of people who care. i'm one of them. a beautifully written poem. well done!


  • skilter
    August 15, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    well written, good flow.


  • broken-angel
    August 12, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    great write x


  • Walls-within
    August 7, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Well...this was indeed very descriptive, and angry even. It even portrays slight hesitation. Very good poem, good luck in your contests!


  • Redeemed15
    August 6, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I CARE! I know how you feel. Please don't do it! It causes so much pain to those around you. Although, I have to admit, I've been in the same position.


  • peregrin
    August 6, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Very nice work!
    Perfect addition to my contest!!!
    Good luck!


  • xXxIceQueenxXx
    July 30, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    That was a very dark poem. There seem to be a lot of poems in this category that have been entered in my contest.

    Thank you for entering!

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