I try so hard
to remember the steps to this dance
do my part in the choreographed routine
but
i keep forgetting my place in the sequences
patterns
I'm inept
awkward
little talent for fitting in
pardon my clumsiness
I really don't mean to stand out
disturb the clockwork precision of motion
I realize the stars of the show
are disturbed by my ignorance as to what comes next
let's face it
the anxious look on my face is helping nobody
however
there is some small comfort in knowing
the music is strange
the audience blind
critics love to argue
I promise
I'll try my best to find the Director
ask again what I was instructed to do
long before the curtain went up on this life and death spectacle
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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A bit dark!
This little dark poem is done so well and is so expressive! Your metaphor is very well chosen and well developed in this poem! I don't usually like dark poems of death, suicide, or just bad thoughts / dreams, but this one is very well written and nicely done! Good work!
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Hello.
A nice write. I like your play on words here, this write has a playful nature. You saying you are trying hard to remember means that you believe on a certain level you know why you are here, only it isn't coming through, but if you can't remember, then how do you know you aren't doing the steps you are meant to?
As for your ignorance, with a name like RollingZen you should get what I am saying, "Pooh hasn't much Brain, but he never comes to any harm. He does silly things and they turn out right." (Hoff B. The Tao of Pooh). HAhahaa.
My regards.
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I'd rather not know what comes next, I find comfort, too, in strange music
and a blind audience..lol...well written..
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Sometimes one needs to go ...
anti-clockwise
Some are born to do just that.
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role-playing:
smooth, not awkward; good use of.. seeming opposites?!
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Well done
I too have re-read it to absorb its nuances. You have a keen insight that you expressed with eloquence.
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This is so good.
I've been back to re-read it several times.
It's straight as an arrow and very clean. Much leaner than I remembered it. You've achieved a warmth here that cost you few words.
Congrats on this. -
Bravo! Bravo!
This is really fine, brother. I love the attitude and I can't wait to hear you read it. Bet you'll have the delivery worked out in no time.
Maybe bring a copy today?
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