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Dear faithful one~

 

Dear faithful one,


I do not want
just a 'man'
to be one of your 'Harem'
to fill your cup with wine

I do not have
the knowledge you have
gained from Antar
and Haroun Rachid

but let me tell you
when you become free
from your mysterious thoughts

I will then
take you on pilgrimage
to my soul where there is
only 'One' ..'You' and 'me'

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Author notes

picture from google

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 18 of 18
  • Bruce silver member
    January 6
    Edit | Reply
    Yes, very very nice. I thought the last stanza was the strongest.


  • chilali
    December 30, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Beautiful take on the prompt. Congratulations on your Silver cup Very well deserved.

    Much love
    Ylova

  • Roy-rahbar
    September 4, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    very good

    Hello Ruby....a very good poem... know about Haroon Rashid..a great king..nothing about Antar..a historicaly romantic..poem...indeed...enjoyed.
    Rahbar.


  • Pamela A Lamppa silver member
    July 27, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Ahhh. yes. Where there is only 'one' you and me. That unity does not come lightly. Beautiful take on this prompt. I did enjoy this very much. ~Pamela


  • Swangrnv gold member
    July 27, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Very nice

    I like this shorty! Very good use of the prompt, and the thoughts conveyed are similar to alot of people who are in search of their 'one'. lots of luck my friend in the contest!


  • PerVirtuous
    July 26, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    You would make a great travel guide! This is well thought out, beautifully constructed, and the image is captivating. You never disappoint, and this is just fun. Have some bunnies.

    • Amarige
      July 26, 2008

      Edit | Reply
      I never thought of that ..thank you Allan..comments from such a talented soul like yourself means a lot to me..

      Ruby


  • PrabhuDayal Khattar gold member
    July 26, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Humm...the approach is very sacred and the hope is universal..amen..amen..amen..and thanks for sharing the delicacy of the heart...


  • paulcreates silver member
    July 26, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I like this new interesting perspective on the prompt. Thank you for entering this contest.

    Paul

    • Amarige
      July 26, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you Paul ,glad you like my new prespective


  • AsIThink gold member
    July 26, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Very good. I have to say that the images and ideas were great. "...but let me tell you
    when you become free
    from your mysterious thoughts..." Now this is a very
    good twist on commonly held views then it is 'women' who mostly appear to be mysterious...lol. Loved how you turned it. I loved these lines, "I will then
    take you on pilgrimage
    to my soul where there is
    only 'One' ..'You' and 'me'" Great job and good luck in this contest.

    • Amarige
      July 26, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Both man and woman can be mysterious at times ..

      Thank you for the lovely comment-Salam


      Ruby


  • Thoughts-of-Soloman
    July 26, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I like it much, the way it's forthright and with a 'punch' at the end.
    Very well done Ruby!

    Sol

    • Amarige
      July 26, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      a 'punch' I like that

      Thank you dear..your words means a lot to me

      Ruby


  • penman gold member
    July 26, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    Wonderful

    Excellent. So very touching and passionate. Best of luck in the contest.

    • Amarige
      July 26, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you Dad..your words means a lot to me

  • mcfreeman
    July 26, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    An amazing write

    • Amarige
      July 26, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      You are my faithful reader thank you my friend

1 - 18 of 18