The candle lighting the way,
Guiding you on the path of life,
Flickering to and from,
Every passing day.
Lifting the weight from our shoulders,
Through treacherous depths and new heights,
The light stays with you,
Clearing away the boulders.
It stays lit,
Your hero, your mentor,
Your hope, your faith,
It stays with you every bit.
The journey ahead,
Unknown to all,
The candle lit by your side,
Protecting you, keeping you fed.
Never dieing out,
Awake watching you in the middle of the night,
To rid away the monsters of this world,
That are out and about.
The candle lighting the way,
Guiding you on the path of life,
Flickering to and from,
Every passing day.
A contest entry
- All 13 an under Deep Poets by Medina Regal.
495 points, ended August 27, 2008, 15 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - #158 Help Set My Holiday Mood by daviscth.
875 points, ended November 10, 2008, 18 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Your Best Pre-Written Rhyme by poets whisper.
800 points, ended November 11, 2008, 56 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 12 of 12
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hummm...gives a really nice feeling of hope in the darkest of times. well done!
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An enjoyable read it made me feel good. Just one small thing and it's this line: "Clearing the away the boulders." I think you meand Clearing away the boulders" ? thank you for entering.
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I really, really enjoyed reading this. I love the imagery in your words and just reading it made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. Thanks so much for sharing with me.
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nice poem heres my constructive critique of a 12 year old
nice though a few grammar fixes an a rewording of a few lines may be in need an the line
"keeps you fed" doesnt seem to make sense an your faith hope, etc... do not feed you
a few grammar an poetry mistakes but this is great!
instead of saying good luck like i have no idea who will win im gonna say ... you better hope you win. -
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Lol, that's mean, but better to be honest though...I guess.
I just feel kinda bad that I'm gloating-ish.
It was a good read, I'd like to know what inspired you to write this. I think it was deeper in the beginning rather than it was at the end. The beginning just seemed so much more heartfelt.
-->pia♫♪
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lol its the truth you never know if your poem gets blown away by the next entry or the previous ones
i dont know either until a see it ...well just have to wait an see
yeah well i like to share the good and bad
its a constructive opinion it shows everything he should fix or doesnt make or sense or is a typo while giving a positive review
it helps the author fix his poem to make it much better an more organized
kind of liked what "light in my hear" or "glitterglosses" replys to yours an my poems
i think opinions like theres are the you can give.
but i dislike wanting to insult someones poem or insisting them to completely change they're poem taking away they're work an replacing it with mine. -
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that's the good thing in critiquing, cause you gotta encourage, so they continue, and you gotta critique, so they can improve, right?
and exactly, It's good not to insist that they should change, because then it won't be theirs, and I think that is the whole point of writing leisurely.
...wait whu. What reviews?
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welocme to allpoetry
how true that faith is like a flame,once light it burns.sometimes bright sometimes low, but always there,
well said and thanks for sharing this with us here.
cheers
Grey
Site Greeter
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welcome to allpoetry
I absolutely love this poem. I don't believe I could find the exact words to express that more. This is beautiful in so many ways. Uplifting and spiritual... just awesomely done. Thank you very much for sharing this here. I hope you will continue writing and sharing your talent.
~Kristy
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Thanks you know that I'm 13, right? If you like my poems so much than please give me some suggestions on things to write about.
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Yeah, fire seems to be a comfort for some reason. It's always warm and gives light. your background and font color make it really hard on the eyes to read though!
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yeah...It kinda hurts.
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