i want to explain with one word, i want to explain it in a thousand
words,
I played ferosciously,
tenderly,
like thunder then bird song,
Wildly, madly,
wanting an audience, not wanting an audience, being the listener,
wanting her, not wanting her,
shame filled anxiety,
i wanted to be the best
no-one can play like me, no-one!
I was genius,
i was a fool,
i played and i played and i played,
Anger spilling onto the keys,
then tenderness
and soft sounds,
vulnerablity exposed,
fear met,
I played and i played and i played,
imperfectly, perfectly
touching my listening, my heart,
i wanted to hurt her,
see my suffering!
see it!
woman
see what you have caused!
i wanted to listen to the sounds for myself,
I played with the flow of my emotion,
filling the air with movements that stir me,
erupt me and explode to a thousand stars,
i played as if there is no tomorrow
key sounds connecting spaces none can reach,
i played for my life
A contest entry
- round one; enter your best. by broken-colours.
600 points, ended December 12, 2008, 21 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Abused??? Let it known! Scream it out, tell the world about it. by starving-to-survive.
1700 points, ended February 3, 99 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 11 of 11
-
Hi Isabella,
In my books you are definitely the queen of powerful metaphors and evocative imagery!! I could actually see you playing on the piano wearing a beautiful dress, hair flowing and perfectly painted nails with all of your passion, heart and emotion.
I have read this poem out loud to myself several times as it conveys a great depth of passion, heart and emotion doing it that way. You really pour your whole self into your poetry and reading it out you hear that. My favourite lines are:
i wanted to listen to the sounds for myself,
I played with the flow of my emotion,
filling the air with movements that stir me,
erupt me and explode to a thousand stars
These are incredibly emotionally intense words for me. I feel the core of my being flying as I read (out loud rather than silently) these very powerful words. It almost feels volcanic to me leading to an amazing starburst!! I am guessing that is the kind of woman you are if you gave yourself permission to be, or in your words "...to play for (your) life."
Isabella you write with all of you and your gamut of emotions, and that is why both your work and you are so admirable and contain such integrity!!!!
Warm wishes,
Liveddog. -
-
my last reply was an accident
my last reply was an accident, i slipped and hit the reply button.
what i want to say is i love your response:
"I feel the core of my being flying as I read (out loud rather than silently) these very powerful words."
thank you, i smiled reading them,
best wishes,
Isabella -
aa
-
thank you
I wrote it after playing the piano and just wrote without thinking much. I appreciate your kind words.
best wishes,
Isabella
-
-
I like it.
Good write. Kind of reminds me of the book of Ecclesiastes.
-
97%
"filling the air with movements that stir me,
erupt me and explode to a thousand stars,
i played as if there is no tomorrow
key sounds connecting spaces none can reach,
i played for my life "
Gorgeous and strong. This sounds like a rant that you would yell at someone mingled with tears. It had one main point but didn't really have a plan, like a long rambled declaration, which I found interesting.
I liked this a lot. And the bit I pasted above was my absolute favourite. What a way to end a poem!
-
Strong in simplicity! Your words scream and jump off the page at me...full of life and emotions, so tender and sweet, yet with so much depth in sorrow and sadness...great closing...very well written...nicely done.
mystic
-
-
thank you
I really appreciate your words,
thank you,
warm wishes,
isabella
-
-
this is a simple and pretty piece you did a great job with the emotions and your voice is heard. The tender and raw images that come up are really provoking and I like your last line. Great writing and great job!
-
-
thank you
thank you, i appreciate your words,
with love,
isabella
-
Adding your comment:
1 - 11 of 11
