Hidden in the darkness,
with nowhere to run.
How can I un-do
the pain that you've done?
Too much to fix over the years....
I've wasted too many precious tears.
Needing you badly,
trusting you blindly,
I couldn't see the truth.
Your motive was love,
but you gave mostly pain.
Leaving us all,
to cry in the rain.
Your desire to help
served only to maim,
You were never very good
at shouldering blame..
My own private Phantom.
No angel in the night.
This is a battle I can no longer fight.
I hear no more music,
at the sound of your name.
All I see is this carnage
that you've come to claim.
Leave me alone,
fly away in the night.
Please ... for once ...
Do what is right.
Author notes
Option 6
Be kind, but be honest too. Did it touch you? Any pointers or ideas how to make it better?
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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u r so good writer keep it up!!!
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Outstanding
I really liked this it was it was full of emotions of hate and love and anger you did an outstanding job on this keep it flowing
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awesome a doomed love leaving carnage all over the show stripping you of your own adintity and your helpless to stop it loved the last four lines a last good deed he could do leaving me asking did he obey or not a great read well done
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This poem starts off a little slow, I'll admit. But right in the middle you kick it up like five notches. This poem has great imagery, I see a dark fantasy unravelling. It's beautiful. And the speaker's relationship to the subject is one that the reader feels. Great job.
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Loved it
I really enjoyed this poem. very well written.
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well said
I can sense the despair and anger, yet the emotions of love hidden underneath the pain and anger....people come into are lives for various reasons sometimes as a test of our strength to walk away. plz dont respond until contest is judged and good luck in my contest.
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