Now I realize
what an abyss is.
It is blackness
that floods your soul.
It is darkness
that encases your body.
It is hopelessness
that cloaks your heart.
It is nothingness
that sucks the thoughts away.
It is blindness
entering those who can see.
It is breathlessness
to the healthy.
Again,
and again,
and again.
An abyss is torrential to the soul
but neutral to the expression.
It is nothingness
Seeing only black ahead.
I understand now.
Blackness has a price.
The price is silver.
Damn.
Improvements? Is this even understandable?
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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I really like this! Its very emotional and thoughtful. I especially liked the repetition, it makes really dramatic (in a good way).
An abyss is torrential to the soul
but neutral to the expression.
^^ I like that part. It makes you think.
Great job on this mommy ily!!! <333
~
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Amazing!
You have such talent for someone so young. I applaud you loudly my dear. I enjoyed this piece for it is easily relatable to those who understand. I enjoyed the flow of it and I liked the again, and again, and again part of it...makes you think. I loved it.
~mandie~
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risa ur ah-mazing
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i meant kate lol i was talking to her and then i was like waiiit lol
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who?
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Yes.
Exactly.
I love the last line; it pulled it all together.
The couplets worked well.
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It is hopelessness
that cloaks your heart.
^^Thats my favorite line. Very good job dearie!
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