Read each detail carefully
Start at chapter one,
And read with me as I write
I cannot speak to you each intricate detail,
Each passing thought travelling through my head;
The pages have been ripped out of my book
Thrown up in the air and blown by the wind
You could try to find those confused pages
Put them back in order;
Organize my book from start to finish
And become enlightened
If only you could read my mind
Author notes
zombiefiedmonkeycheese - option 3
Listened to this song today, I used to love it when I was younger...never really thought about the lyrics until tonight, and I thought I'd write a poem based on it. Just talking about how sometimes I can't convey what's in my head...and people get confused and frustrated by me because my own thoughts are messed up.
Stars on 54 - If You Could Read My Mind
http://artists.letssingit.com/stars-on-54-lyrics-if-you-could-read-my-mind-6mld5hp
A contest entry
- Best contest EVER! [i would like to think so anyway haha] by thearmsofsorrow.
475 points, ended August 1, 2008, 25 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - best prewrites by dory.
500 points, ended July 30, 2008, 89 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Confusion by loveaswellashate.
500 points, ended August 5, 2008, 17 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Anything Goes by silentxparadise93.
600 points, ended September 11, 2008, 80 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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this is really good i liked it.. the image was there even with such a short poem.. thank you for joining my contest
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hey
firstly, thanks for your entry
hmm i looked at the original lyrics and i think this was a very honest take on it. like, you injected yourself into something that already existed, and this was the result
the analogies in this were amazing, like how you compared your life or your thoughts rather, to a book. that was still being written. In this poem, it feels like everything is supposed to be there and has like its own place. i must admit your poem didnt quite bow me away. but it was good all the same.
cheers -
wonderfulness, as per usual!
i really liked "You could try to find those confused pages
Put them back in order"
nicely done!

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I really enjoyed...sometimes everyone's thoughts are jumbled...and the song is interesting too...
I like that it's shorter...just describing chapter one...as if everything got messed up right after that...
"The pages have been ripped out of my book
Thrown up in the air and blown by the wind"
Amazing imagery...like if you were reading outside on a windy day...
"You could try to find those confused pages
Put them back in order;
Organize my book from start to finish
And become enlightened"
I guess no one can really read your mind...but sometimes if certain people are important enough to you, you'll try hard enough to make it less confusing as possible. It might take time for you to get your own thoughts organized...and make sure you don't leave those important people behind while your looking... -
great poem... you really put it together real well...
" You could try to find those confused pages
Put them back in order;
Organize my book from start to finish
And become enlightened
If only you could read my mind"
really great part.... i wish i could read my mind... keep up the great writing... 7.5/10




