Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read • Contests • Groups • Learn • Forums • Store • Help
 

I Don't Want You To Go

You are my better half
I'm grateful for that
You loved me once
And you won't come back
I fell behind
I've been so blind
There are things
That I need to unwind

So hold on, please hang on
My love's strong

And I don't want you to go

So hold on, please hang on
To all above, and below
And I don't want you to go
And I don't want you to go
Ohhh I don't want you to go
I don't want you to go

I need you back
As I fade to black
I promise you
No verbal attack
Never meant to break
Was my own mistake
You fall asleep
While it's me who's laying awake

So hold on, please hang on
My love's strong

And I don't want you to go

So hold on, please hang on
To all above, and below
And I don't want you to go
And I don't want you to go
Ohhh I don't want you to go
I don't want you to go

I know my pain
Won't go away
Laying still and numb
But to you I'm always the same
I know I've changed
My life's rearranged
I'll sell my soul
For your love in exchange

So hold on, please hang on
My love's strong

And I don't want you to go

So hold on, please hang on
To all above, and below
And I don't want you to go
And I don't want you to go
Ohhh I don't want you to go
I don't want you to go

My love, I don't want you to go

Author notes

As soon as I saw the list of bands, I was amazed for I love every band there! So immediately I knew like all of the songs to each band .. and what popped into my head right away .. was this connection to what I wrote. I used two songs from two bands, hope you don't mind.

Korn - Hold On
Seether - Hang On

I tried to write my own thing .. but I just had to keep "hold on" and "hang on" as to its part of what I'm relating to in a past relationship. The last real relationship I was in ended in a way in which I neglected my girlfriend, which i never meant to do. I was going to school and focusing on school as my main priority. My girlfriend, at the time, felt like I was neglecting her since time with her was rationed to almost zero. I felt bad and tried to make things up to her, saying that everything will be fine once I graduated. She broke up with me shortly after and I tried to get her back into my life. I just wanted school to be over with, I needed her to hold on and to hang on, just until I graduated. I didn't want her, or our love to go away. With that said, my inspiration has been met. I hope you enjoy!

p.s. this could also be a tribute to - Lani Hall - I Don't Want You To Go, Kyla does a great job of this song too! as well .. could have been possibly a flip song for my ex girfriend .. and what she was thinking, kind of like having two venues going in different directions .. check it out .. it's a nice song!

<<< Don't You, Forget About Me - Contest >>>
Option 8.

Bands and Songs:
Lani Hall - I Don't Want You To Go
Korn - Hold On
Seether - Hang On

A contest entry

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 24 of 24

  • CatQueen248
    August 31, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This was such a sad, but beautiful poem and song. I hope that in the end she came back to you or that there is still hope and you are trying to win her back. Or at least that you have moved on and found someone else. Either way just remember to never give up on love.


  • NotOfThisWorld
    August 4, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I know this is a song, but I think that the repeated choruses could have been filled with something else to make it more fulfilling. At any rate, it is still a great poem. Not sure what the last line is though... Thanks for the entry!

    • Davidlee
      August 4, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      My reasons for not having a more fulfilling chorus is because of the length of the song, an easier chorus to remember would help with the song. But I do understand, wish it was more filling. Thanks for your comment, I appreciate it


  • Hetha gold member
    August 3, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I think you are definitely on to something here. Song lyrics seem to be a wonderful way for you to express yourself, and I would encourage you to continue writing them. Keep on penning.

    • Davidlee
      August 3, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you so much ... it means wonders to hear such comments! Glad you liked


  • Florida Sunshine
    July 30, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I was recently introduce to Seether by another poet doing a contest ~ immediately after hearing the song I was moved to pen. ~ right after I went to download all the music I could.

    I love the flow of your poem -- I don't know the other two but I'll check em out. If they are anything like Seether I might be downloading somemore. Your poem does Seether justice.

    Excellent job!

    Thanks for entering the contest - it was my pleasure reading your work ~ best of luck to you ~

    Florida Sunshine

    • Davidlee
      July 30, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thanks for your lovely comment! Like I said previously, I tried to make this my own, but I love these bands so much .. sometimes it's hard to stray away from their wicked songs. I'm a music junkie, I listen to some oldies... and all kinds of metal. I'm very glad you enjoyed this piece! Thanks again!


  • offlimits
    July 29, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    thank you

    thank you this is much appreciated


  • Poetic Obscenity
    July 29, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    I absolutley adore

    All of those songs. Especially "Hold On"
    -laughs- Now i must watch the video again. Look what you've done, sparking my addictions with your amazing writes. Hehe.

    "I need you back
    As I fade to black
    I promise you
    No verbal attack
    Never meant to break
    Was my own mistake
    You fall asleep
    While it's me who's laying awake"

    Simply amazing.

    • Davidlee
      July 29, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      So .. i'm assuming you were "wowified" by this piece? Glad you liked it!


  • SilverWolf
    July 29, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    "And I don't want you to go
    And I don't want you to go"

    i thnk the second time that shud be like a echo

    i love that
    singin it in my head
    I dont want you to go
    *echo* I dont want you to go

    • Davidlee
      July 29, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      you should listen to the Tribute song for this.

      Lani Hall - I Don't Want You To Go

      It's not really my style of music, but I enjoy all music and when I heard this song for the first time ... and the options for this contest .. sparks and ideas came to mind in an intstant I'm very glad you are hooked to the lyrics, it is kind of catchy


  • SilverWolf
    July 28, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    wow!!!!
    omg i hope u win!


  • Shydreamer3
    July 25, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Ok i loved this it was like a song right? BUt i read it as poem which to me is the same thing anyway. Great write again u r an awesome poet.


  • xDisasterous Angelx
    July 24, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    I luffle this! just like i luffle you. =] well ima read everything that i havent read yet. lol

    • Davidlee
      July 24, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      hehe luffles all around!!!! hehe thanks doll, glad you enjoyed .. how's your sister .. she still singing along with you?


  • HiddenByTheDark
    July 24, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    WOW!! i love this poem it's so powerful and full of love.. even though it seems you have lost the love. My favorite piece by you so far.. love you

    ♥always Kate

    • Davidlee
      July 24, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thanks doll .. hehe That made my day .. now we are even! Very glad you enjoyed this!


  • Re-invention silver member
    July 23, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I'll sell my soul
    For your love in exchange
    those lines took me away

    ncely penned my friend I enjoyed it
    best of luck!

    • Davidlee
      July 24, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thanks a bunch, you are a sweetheart Glad you enjoyed!

1 - 24 of 24