sunlight
along a walking track
ants collide
A contest entry
- Teach me how to write a haiku by notorious.
2246 points, ended August 10, 2008, 44 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
haiku
Comments
1 - 12 of 12
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There's a lot of ways to think about this poem. It really is great.
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You must not have been walking very fast if you're noticing what's happening to ants.
I like this - colliding ants with each other, I think they like it, and with the patch of sunlight.

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Appearences
Really made me sit and think about why this appears to happen to ants under circumstances that make no sense to humans - when there is clear vision.
Ants do not collide, of course: and here I found my personal key to the haiku. No matter how obvious, appearances really do deceive!
Stunner!
Thanks for the subtlety and best of luck in the contest.
Best, p

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i love the frenzy in this; makes me think of not just ants; but people on a busy sidewalk. New York City comes to mind for some odd reason.
LOVE it
-sailor ptolema -
cause you rocked my face off here


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You need to submit more than 1!! Hahaha I must learn!
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Ah, myron... and the contest hostess did not even ask how long you have been writing haiku.
She kicked my butt.
I am learning from you, myron and thank you for sharing your talent with us learners.
lol


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cause I know he's a pro haiku writer
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This is quite good!
Perfect image in words.

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brilliant myron! I don't really have the heart to go into more detail right now...I'm tired after being harassed on here today
I shall come back later with a more insightful comment


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Awww, I'll be your...renegade killer
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Well clearLy, this is the kind of thing I need to learn how to write...LoL.
I guess you don't need a dash after 'sunlight' because...sunlight flows with the second line?
The walking track of lines is absolutely disgusting & totally brilliant.
Thanks for entering...after I sent you the URL
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