driving down the road i suddenly feel my phone's vibrations
i put the phone to my ear and hear a whisper of a sweet promise
i say a silent pray that our tempers dont get the best of us
he is once more calling me from halfway around the world
i sigh, lean into the phone hoping that this one isn't my last,
i feel my heart flutter as i hear him say "hello my beautiful seniorita"
i begin laughing as i hear the other guys in the backround
"how she holding up with out her teddy bear?"
"tell her to please send some of her homemade cookies, we're starving!"
"is she doing aight, puto?" and "hey tell her i send my love!"
i hold the phone giggling like a little school girl
his love for me washes over me as he says
"shut up you idiots! i cant hear a damn thing she says!"
in a quiter tone "you still there beautiful?"
"where else would i be? its not like i'd rather be somewhere else."
he guffaws and says "you sure? im just kidding beautiful, dont get all mad,
i know you dont. i dont have long on the phone. we're heading out soon."
i feel the tears coming as i try to stay strong
"oh," long akward silence until i get under control and say
"you and the boys make sure to keep your heads down and your spirits high!"
as i hear him repeat that to the boys, they begin to laugh,
their love for me, makes me feel like a little girl,
a girl that laughs at anything no matter if others look at me funny
we hadnt been on the phone for naught but ten minutes when i heard
"FIRST PLATOON!!! FORM UP!" in the backround,
i hear him saying "beautiful, i love and miss you soo much..
but i have to go now.. il try to call you soon!"
i didnt even get to say it back.. before the line went dead...
when i got home i couldnt sit still,
"he still loves me!" running around in my head
i feel like im going to burst like a little school girl
i cry both happy tears, that he was able to call me one more time,
and of loneliness, as the pain for him not being around sets in once more.
i put the phone to my ear and hear a whisper of a sweet promise
i say a silent pray that our tempers dont get the best of us
he is once more calling me from halfway around the world
i sigh, lean into the phone hoping that this one isn't my last,
i feel my heart flutter as i hear him say "hello my beautiful seniorita"
i begin laughing as i hear the other guys in the backround
"how she holding up with out her teddy bear?"
"tell her to please send some of her homemade cookies, we're starving!"
"is she doing aight, puto?" and "hey tell her i send my love!"
i hold the phone giggling like a little school girl
his love for me washes over me as he says
"shut up you idiots! i cant hear a damn thing she says!"
in a quiter tone "you still there beautiful?"
"where else would i be? its not like i'd rather be somewhere else."
he guffaws and says "you sure? im just kidding beautiful, dont get all mad,
i know you dont. i dont have long on the phone. we're heading out soon."
i feel the tears coming as i try to stay strong
"oh," long akward silence until i get under control and say
"you and the boys make sure to keep your heads down and your spirits high!"
as i hear him repeat that to the boys, they begin to laugh,
their love for me, makes me feel like a little girl,
a girl that laughs at anything no matter if others look at me funny
we hadnt been on the phone for naught but ten minutes when i heard
"FIRST PLATOON!!! FORM UP!" in the backround,
i hear him saying "beautiful, i love and miss you soo much..
but i have to go now.. il try to call you soon!"
i didnt even get to say it back.. before the line went dead...
when i got home i couldnt sit still,
"he still loves me!" running around in my head
i feel like im going to burst like a little school girl
i cry both happy tears, that he was able to call me one more time,
and of loneliness, as the pain for him not being around sets in once more.
Author notes
option 3
when you say you love me, i feel like a littler girl again
&
option 4
1. vibrations
2. whisper
3. temper
4. calling
8. sigh
15. seniorita
this was an actuall phone call..two nights ago..from my boyfriend..
A contest entry
- - 7 Fantastic Options - by xxRainbowDawnxx.
1050 points, ended July 25, 2008, 15 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - The Unknown Path to Love by Endeavor.
1300 points, ended August 17, 2008, 20 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - WHY when i love??? by offlimits.
450 points, ended September 4, 2008, 34 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Want to be READ? ENTER HERE! by Avatar of Innocence.
525 points, ended September 7, 2008, 131 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Make this THE largest Contest EVER on AP [enter, enter, enter!] by Symphony.
18000 points, ended April 28, 1014 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
-
this was lovely to read, it felt like i was reading someone's journal entry which shows their excitement at hearing from the one they love, and knowing that they too are loved -
you're lucky, whoever you are, to have someone like that
thanks for sharing this with us
-
this is beautiful i loved it so much
good luck and god bless
love cassie -
Very Good
i didnt even get to say it back.. before the line went dead...
when i got home i couldnt sit still,
"he still loves me!" running around in my head
i feel like im going to burst like a little school girl
i cry both happy tears, that he was able to call me one more time,
and of loneliness, as the pain for him not being around sets in once more.
I realy felt your feelings in this
The letter form and direct words do not add to the beauty
yet it very much how life is
Enough for me to cry
Glad he still love you
I may give this an HM, just for your trama and his
Rick


-
Beautiful piece. Could feel the wave of emotions riding through you and your boyfriend, capturing the anxiety that's there before either one of you speaks, and then the emotions that swell up hearing his voice, followed by the longing. It's a beautiful piece!!
-
hmmmm very intense... so sweet and cute and so relatable to me at the moment, as he makes me feel this way.
1 - 5 of 5




