To walk beside you hand in hand
Skim stones across your sea
To sit with you and understand
The way you think of me
To see the twilight kiss your beach
And watch the lapping waves
While keeping brandy well in reach
The drink that always saves!
To see your city learn its ways
To watch you wear it well
In all your little works and plays
And know the tales you tell
Another life that's full and sweet
With sadness and with joy
I'd love to feel I was complete
Ah yes, a girl and boy
In a list
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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I want to be where the background is...ahhhhhh
and the poem isn't bad either
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Personally, I think you have stopped it at just the right point. Nice work.
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Come on ...
you cannot stop this poem just there! It has such an enjoyable flow, and a message that skips through the mind, and then ... nothing more. But then, it should stop just there, and leave the reader to linger within its words. The first stanza sets the scene well. With few words you enable a deep dive into what is contained in the words: ‘Ah, yes’. The second and third stanza add depth, but also provides the ‘coloring’ of the two different worlds, as they talk, feel, think and respond. I have the feeling that they one is more earthy than the other, and more lonely now! [please take note of the 2 “the’s” in the second line of stanza 2]. The final stanza portrays a yearning – straight, without pretence – taking the reader back to the title. A most enjoyable write. Frans
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