life is a conversation
without configuration of stars
natural occurrences
astronomers study,
lovers gaze at,
poets write about
nobody dies
if they don't shine
you'll get by
like a missing sock,
just turn up
and we'll all say
he's back
just like that
never ask
never question
the reason you're alone
why Sunday's paper
made you shiver
and Tuesday's were good
with no sins or guns
how numb was skin
when we hugged you,
clinging like vines,
a lifeless frame
of weary bones
saw her
awhile ago
black pants
red paper smile
and a bundle
resembling you
told me
you were tumbling
as a weed between
Tuscon
eighteen wheels
singing
a breakdown
of her sordid lies
never asked her why
a year since
your solid reflection
was born
there you are
still hanging on
to small scars
asking
what she's doing now
In a list
What did you think
Comments
1 - 19 of 19
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I read it a couple of times before it sunk in. Made me think of how 'coming home' now will probably never be the same as it was before. And yet I dream.
Sincerely,
Leo Long
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Oh I love this one. It absolutely touched me.
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Thanks Hun, had some powerful help with this from James (apples fell) he is a sweetheart, it made the poem sound finished with just one small adjustment. He's a peach and a great poet too.
Love, C
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Oh no doubt he is. I so enjoy his work, and wish he wrote more often.
He actually helped me with one of mine today as well. This piece turned out just lovely.
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Good stuff!
You really nailed this one.
Congratulations.
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You are so effing poetic, & all I can do is write poems lambasting Assface, & involving you in them (oh yes, I wrote another one, & you have a similar, but still important role in killing him again)..
LMAOLMAO
Okay..& your poem
"life is a conversation
without configuration of stars"
THAT'S AWESOME. It makes it seem like life is unplanned, as opposed to..stars' configuration.
"natural occurrences
astronomers study,
lovers gaze at,
poets write about"
Really clever comparisons.
MISSING SOCKS ARE TERRIBLE!!!! OMG!!
"clinging like vines,
a lifeless frame
of weary bones"
Yikes--sounds like Mary-Kate Olsen when she was anorexic.
"red paper smile"
As in...Chinese money wrappers?
That's what I'm thinking of.
"eighteen wheels singing"
Please explain any possible reference I'm missing here...this is very cool.
"asking what she's doing now"
WHAT a fabulous ending...it has a very...epic feel, like a TV show's ending or song lyrics.
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such an undercurrent of social apathy in this for me.. not so much from the poet's voice, but.. of how no one makes things their business... it made me think of someone here... and of others who come and go, and no one asks of the between things ...
whether the time away was good, bad, otherwise.. picking up as if nothing was wrong, nothing amiss...
we call that carpet sweeping here..
of how much we communicate without saying a word, letting assumptions serve as small truths...
and many other things..
wonderfully done..
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Thanks Liza, as I said to James I have been addicted to way too much country music lately lol that and society's apathy. You hear it everyday, trains, buses and on the street. People asking 'oh whatever happened to...and the answer is always the same 'I don't know, he just dissappeard'. Shame really because you usually are losing a friend most times you hear this said. Love, Chez
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Yes, I know what you mean...yes..... and it happens on the internet too ..somehow even more ..sad for me because I always wonder where people go......
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Sometimes that is worse because we just see a name and then it vanishes. We make connections on here lol Lord knows we do! Then without explanation they are gone...they forget how much of it can hurt a heart.
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exactly!!
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I am deeply touched and honored James, thank you so very much my friend 
Love, Chez
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You are welcome, dear.
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This is beautifully told. Like snippets, tied together with a glorious tumbling quality. "and Tuesday's were
a good day
with no sins or guns" - I think you might want to consider saying "and tuesday's were good
with no sins or guns". At least, I think that would be more effective. I love the internal rhymes at the beginning. Your vine stanza is so good. I want to steal it...LOL. There is a lot to be proud of here. I like the reference to tuscan and how you added it in. Really, I think this is my favorite poem by you so far. But, I could be wrong.
;
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I think I have been watching too much of the country music channel on cable lol...but thanks I like the way it turned out too!
Your point is well considered and I have changed it and it does work better Thanks James, what would I do without you C
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Loving this. Your are truly gifted,
country music in your brain or not...LOL.
I gave it another go with that change and now
it really feels, finished. You would have to make a muse named James without me...
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lol I don't think there would ever be two of you
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Shucks.
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