The glow of the embers in this,
the last fire that shall warm us both,
bring us closer, draw us in before
the rivers: cold fills our mouths,
letting us fall away from each other
on currents that no longer have our names
written through each other, no longer hide
us in otter skins, allow us to act like idiots.
No, I shall go the attic, blow off the dust,
look at pictures, wipe off tears, rattle
the last few bones of good bye. Stop.
Listen to see if somewhere hands don’t clap,
laughter grow louder, the door burst.
Hello.
I was never made for parting. I neither
molt like a bird, nor shed my skin like a snake.
I will never make it through life as a hermit crab.
Once your fingers nestled into my palm,
our hearts learned to support the rush of blood
cool the heat of bone, it was complete.
Our forever never visited by shadows.
Our bounty of joy so great people who stood near
just, for the hours of happiness they would feel.
I stand at the door. I am not quite ready for tears,
unable to resource the anger, still learning to believe
the words. Maybe, when I hear it on the news...
Maybe when I wake up tomorrow, and the bed is
still empty. Good bye will be an echo on my lips
until they are cold and blue.
5:45 PM
07/21/08
Alexandria, VA
In a list
A contest entry
- . by Aurora Ceres.
4000 points, ended July 27, 24 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think, what it makes you feel, how you are moved.
Comments
1 - 30 of 30
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Oh My~
Love the line: Goodbye will be an echo on my lips-
Powerful line Tom~ and then follows with a encore
Excellent take on the prompt with words that Inspires Hello- amidst a tearful parting
As told to me...Make each meeting a memorable one-
soak in the essence of tranquility-so when the physical state alters- there are not final
goodbyes-
Congratulations on Your Trophy win!
-Throws confetti-
Woooooooooo Hoooooooooooo
Thank You for sharing Your Heart and Spirit~
Many blessings to You in all You do Sweet Soul
Best wishes too
and much love & light~ Desire~*~
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The conditon of togetherness holds true when you are together. The potential for togetherness is found in the opportunity we create in our hearts.
For years, because I moved all the time as a military brat, I neve let anyone come close enough to hurt when they left. Instead I was left with the emptiness of an untouched life. It is but a small part, but should be known. It is why I am so aware of the things that spark memories and how we can not just shed the past but must grow through it and then beyond.
Love, Tom B.
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<
These things are always hard to write. It is so easy to become maudlin. So I didn't tell anyone what to feel or what it all meant. I, just, stuck to the images and the metaphors. Kept it simple and clear. Most things with a lot of feelings attached need that, it is a form of respect.
I will miss you on this site. Your quick comments and signing yourself as my brat always made my day a little bigger and brighter. I never came to expect them, but each one glowed inside of me helping to support all my smiles and caring for that day.
I hope you don't make yourself a stranger. I hope you even go so far as to feel you are making a nuisance of yourself. You never will succeed at that, but i would enjoy it if you tried.
Love, Tom B. -
You have moved me to tears, Goodbyes are so final.
I could feel this deeply,pain washes over my soul as I read each line.
Then i always read the comments and your replys.
My oldest son went through what you did with the girlfriend he was to marry his senior yr.
She passed in a car wreak, sad to say even though he found love again..hes never been the same.
I found this so sad...
but i know goodbyes are a part of life for one reason or another.
Hugs
~Lisa~
To Aurora,
I am sorry you must say goodbye.
for whatever reason my prayers go with you.
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When ever we truly love, we are forever changed. Good byes are not Alohas and I spent too much of my life as a military brat not letting myself get close so I wouldn't have to care about moving.
It led to a great deal of emptiness that I, in the end, turned upon myself. We must attend to all our feelings and accept the good an the bad and feel them as they are without drama, wallowing or playing with them for attention. We must learn to honor ourselves so we can honor the feelings of others and begin to live life with a sense of grace.
Love, Tom B.
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Oh. I cannot breathe, this is so painful. I'm no stranger to loss, but it does get harder every time.
Pain does have it's beauty, doesn't it?
Tom, your views on life and love and everything in between are so inspiring. Funny how I punish myself when I'm angry or sad, by not reading it. Seeing that love you have on screen just tears me up sometimes.
I've been desperately in love, but never this meaningful. Make sense?
As always, wonderful,
Jin
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Make sense? Far too much. Perhaps it is why I take the time to show the choices and alternatives and the passages involved. I have walked too many of the paths. I have felt a lot of the pain.
Keep talking, I am listening.
Love, Tom B.
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When one is confronted with this starkness of reality, the loss of someone dear, there is that moment of not believing, then having to accept the fact, then the grieving and anger afterwards. Very definite stages one goes through till finally they learn to move on without the person who has died. Liked your metaphoric way of writing about this time, and the reflections we all have about this topic. You have made it personal and shared your views on this matter very well.
. Rewarded 8
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Thanks. I wanted to catch the wave tossed feelings, the memories and my relationship to them. Shaw said that death is a survivors affair. Good byes are too often little deaths with both sides unable to share their mourning.
Love, Tom B.
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I do like the way this flows, and am always caught in the way your thoughts manifest in your poetry, Tom. The images are so original in your turn of a word. This poem is warmth and cold, full of bruising which comes from parting. Yet goodbyes are necessary sometimes to receive closure.
Someone told me recently, that in one culture, people believe that to mourn more than a month after a loved one passes keeps the soul of the one passed from peace, but I have watched survivors die of broken hearts, too. It's strange how we begin to feel our mortality with time, and eternity seems less than real. It seems to take lifetimes to get the importance of love right now and blessing as we pursue other goals. Time slips away and we do with it.
I am going to add this partial comment here, too:
I do not think you are made for parting, Tom. You are meant for the fingers nestled in your palm and the tenderness of a companion. The intention of your warmth radiates in the emotional impact of your words.
You squeezed my heart with this poem, hard. Touch, tenderness, love.... to miss those things is to die, even as we keep on breathing in our less than perfect forms and facades. It's no wonder, we look to fleeting moments of escape is it...with the prices we exact of one another sometimes by witholding our hands and hearts from one another until it's too late.
Somehow, I don't think death is a much of a reprieve. We all need to be cherished.
Cherished. Cherished.
Yes, my friend, you got to me with this one. ~K
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This was written to catch the point where we recognize it is over. The place where it all rushes back on you like a wave swirling about your feet, full of little eddys, but in the end all returning to the sea. It is as full of my relationship with memories as the memories themselves and in the end, I wanted to catch how sometimes there is no closure only a softening of the echoes of loss. I can hear how this touched you. Unfortunately, the hardest thing is to see all the ways we touch others.
Love, Tom B.
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could not get it. Sorr
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Feel blessed that those close to you have not been stolen away with permanant endings.
Love, Tom B.
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'no longer hide us in otter skins' - what an amazing line! This is such an honest and heartfelt poem, I especially liked the way you use a range of senses to evoke your emotions and the way memory is evoked. This is a very moving write, it's both reflective and elegaic, both enhanced by your appropriate use of language. Thank you for sharing one of the most impressive pieces I think I've encountered on this site. I'm glad I'm in such a happy mood today, because the melancholia of this beautifully phrased and structured piece would make me go inside myself and reflect too on what was but I can't help but admire your artistry. Great, great write.
. Rewarded 8
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This was to capture a sense of Good bye. I ended up catching one that was a little final. But, I only see Aloha generally. Good byes being far to final. But the contest wasn't Aloha. So you got my fuller sense of the ending and melancholy in Good by.
Love, Tom B.
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Sad and beautiful
This was very moving- it is overflowing with loss. There is no particular line- it is the whole piece- excellent composition. You were able to create a powerful emotional response overall- abstract personal references that overall suggest a lost intimacy, of standing by the love of your life as they pass their last breath, or grieving in the wake of terrible tragedy that has taken your greatest love away. Death and decay, the currents of inescapable fate destroying a relationship. It is a beautifully depressing piece of tragedy; I hope that it is not based on personal experience.
I look foward to reading more of your works if they are of this caliber.
. Rewarded 8
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I try not to get into purple language and sometimes fail miserably. I strive to create a sense of connection between my reader and the poem so they can access readily all the sensations I have tried to create. It appears this happened for you. There is a point in the impact of loss, before shock, anger or all of the reactions, when you look back across the landscape and fail to accept. I tried to catch this. I tried to create the feeling of the sudden awakening to a great loss.
The closest I ever came is in high school. I woke up planning to make today, the best day ever. As I left my dorm room and made for the bath rooms, the student body president told me he had to talk to me. A young lady I loved had died in a car accident. Before the denial, was the impact of the loss.
Normally, because of illness or age or whatever, one is not too suprised to lose someone. This was just to try to capture that sense of suddeness.
Love, Tom B.
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Tom, this is a very melancholic write, enhanced by your beautiful style and heart. Good-bye's are such sweet sorrow...Love, lane
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Sometimes Good by is all that is left.
Love,
Tom B.
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When you take this to a deeper level like a life time mate; a spouse....This read rocks the foundation of love. The images I get is of a man loving a lady knowing one day he might have to face the world all alone without that special someone. So he will never say good-bye no matter....This the stuff that love is made of..I have been there.....excellent write and powerful thoughts it gave me..........novy
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You see it how it's meant. Time gathers memories about us. We become accustomed to things passing in a certain way with the grace of another's love. I have often listened to the elderly who, while vibrant and alive, will stop, look at me say, "I almost wish I had been first so I would never know what it means to not have the right person to share this with. "
Love, Tom B.
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Oh Mr. Tomisb...you write so beautifully no matter the subject. Every single part of this poem I loved. I felt every word. When I tried to pick my favorite part to copy here, I couldn't. The whole piece is just gold.
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Perhaps, I am no more than a big hearted silly man. But, I don't think so at all. some things are just misplaced. They are never forgotten.
Love, Tom B.
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Aurora will adore this for it speaks of so much more than just the simple goodbye, the simple leaving. It speaks of hearts and souls and a hope that it is not forever. Love, C
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She is my AP Daughter. I have just a special bond. It is never about the leaving, it is always about the not being here.
Love, Tom B.
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Poignant but...
it is not the least bit dark. More sentimental but doesn't leave you aching but if you didn't know her it makes you wish you did. I think you were very gentle and tender in your approach in telling Aurora goodbye. She must have cried a river reading this. I feel a tear welding myself.
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Sadness is dark for me. I guess it is a matter of comparison or experience. This is perhaps no more than the shock of having to say good bye. Perhaps it is more. Maybe she will tell me.
Love, Tom B.
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A very poignant good-bye... to a beautiful and talented gal... This site will sorely miss her gift and we will be hard pressed to forget her so, in a way we never really do say good-bye...
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we make connections and allow a flow to fill the space. It yearns not to be broken. When it is, we ask ourselves, "Did I do something wrong?"
Love, Tom B.
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