I gaze out across the landscape,
At the world beneath,
This castle is my prison,
My captor's cruel bequeath.
I sit here by the window,
Watching the world go by,
Waiting and desperately hoping
Fighting not to cry.
I've waited for a life-time,
For my handsome knight,
To free me from my last captor,
My faith to reignite.
And soon he does draw near,
Upon white stallion so pure,
Galloping ever closer,
The dark I must now endure.
Yet lo, what can be happening,
Why does he stray from the road?
A maiden he does now behold,
Of beauty so stunning, untold.
He glances at me from horseback,
With eyes like deep blue sea,
Then gives me a smile of pity,
And turns his back on me.
The hope in my heart does wither,
As warm love does turn to ice,
How can my love show such cruelty,
And fool me by such a device?
'Twas you who did pursue me,
And run after me each day,
Smiling that smile so sweet,
Leaving my heart in disarray?
Or was that all a horrid, cruel joke,
Designed to hurt and to maim,
To damage and hurt my pre-injured heart,
And leave my love aflame?
Yet now I see that you do turn,
Away from maid so fair,
And turn your head to catch my eye,
As if my heart to repair.
I feel the desire burn in my heart,
To be free and lay in your arms,
To feel your lips upon my own,
Away from another's false charms.
But still you linger upon the path
And don't try to rescue me,
As my heart does flutter within my chest,
With my sweet dream to be free.
And as the sun sets upon the hill,
I know that I still must wait,
For you will linger, forevermore,
At my prison's gate.
A contest entry
- Ayyy write me something..Anything you want by tearfulgirl420.
300 points, ended August 22, 2008, 58 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Band-aids Fall off a Patched up Heart by ThatONEweirdChick.
900 points, ended September 8, 2008, 16 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - give me your best! by breakdown-beatdown.
550 points, ended September 6, 2008, 12 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - My Very First Contest! yay! enter NOW quick !!!! haha by Nostalgic Moon.
525 points, ended September 1, 2008, 11 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Love Askew by whispernthedark.
875 points, ended October 7, 2008, 33 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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This is a wonderful story, so sad at the end. Congratulations on your prior silver win for it. Thank you for entering the contest, good luck.
♥
whisper
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I'm sorry Piccola, you're right, it is far over the 32 line limit. I've removed it from the contest.
Sorry once again.. I think its length must have slipped my mind.
Anyway best of luck with your contest, hope it all goes well
Katie
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Unless my math is really bad (which could be) I think this goes beyond the 32 line limit. You may either correct me, edit or remove. Thank you for entering.
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Enjoyed it very much,
And soon he does draw near,
Upon white stallion so pure,
Galloping ever closer,
The dark I must now endure-my favorite part..
i like the flow of it, i feel the despair.
may you find joy
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This was so amazing. Good luck in the contest.
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this is wonderful!
it leaves me pretty speachless, it's very beautiful! best of luck! -
this was REALLY good. . . not my style but still i loved it very very beautiful and i LOVED the ending
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Wow.. even though this is a prewrite into my contest... it really seems like you wrote it for me. It's a great great thing when you can do that with poetry. I loved the way you said this and the rhyming that you used. It just had a great flow and the words hit me hard. Thanks for this entry!
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Great!
I appreciated the story, the rhyme, and the flow of this poem. The background was well fitting. The reason I ejected it from my contest was that it didn't quite fit any of the given categories. While it obviously was about love, it didn't appear to involve opposites attracting and finding love or finding love through mutual heartache. At first I thought it would be the option of coming to the realization that it was your ex who was unworthy, but in the end the subject seemed to be still pining for their love in acceptance that they'll never come around. That said, the poem itself was greatly appreciated and right along the lines of my general preferences.
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Katie.
Oh My F*ing GOD. Katie! Thats beautiful! The dark tone in the poem sets my heart on FIRE. PLEASE enter contests with this cuz jesus christ ur blody amazing! Ive never read such a heart felt poem before.. really! I was not bored 1 WORD of it. Im obsessed with it really its just beautiful and makes me want to cry its just beautiful. You are amazing. im not just saying it, this poem is just **** BRILLIANT. please keep writing.
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