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And We Thought We Were GODS




SHE wrote, step lightly
and handle with care
upon her belly,
whispered, protect my children
in the breeze,
sent warnings which shook
the foundation of over filled baskets
in which eggs began to break.
We heeded to none
as the human race spread
infecting her body,
like a disease with no cure
      

      ~and  SHE cried,


flooding land and seas
shifting lives structure

 

      ~and we crumbled


like ants under feet of giants,
crushed to overpopulated dust
of greed and unheeded signs
 

      ~and SHE sat naked


in a universe once filled with hope
screaming in silence,
SHE called HIS name
and her soul stirred
as a single seed was planted 

 

      ~and the healing began.

Author notes

critique

In a list

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 42 of 42

  • Sheilasbabygal4life
    October 11
    Edit | Reply
    This was good. I enjoyed this. You can go too round 2. Thanks for entering and best of luck too you in Round 2/ This was amazing!!!!!!!!!!


  • daviscth silver member
    August 24

    Edit | Reply
    Every time I click on something written by you I know it is going to make me stop and think. The imagery in this is amazing as always. The title captured my attention and your lines are perfectly created to make reading this a pure pleasure. Thanks for sharing.


  • Tqop
    July 25
    Edit | Reply
    Very graphic. Thanks for sharing.


  • pain is love.
    June 13
    Edit | Reply
    This is a powerful piece of poetry. I liked the flow. Thank you for your entry!


  • T.o.r.t.u.r.e. gold member
    May 18

    Edit | Reply
    love the background and the poem is really very good thank you for entering and good luck in the contest


  • SubKitten
    April 16

    Edit | Reply
    An astounding piece! The emotion came through very well and the flow was steady and strong. The image you portrayed with this was amazing and very emotional. Fantastic write!

  • SapereAude11
    April 13
    Edit | Reply
    Strong title... Solid effort, this should be a contender


  • lunarlunacy
    December 7, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    sad but true how we destroy to so called thrive


  • Forgotten Anomaly
    November 10, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Do you mean human instead of humane?

    This is so true and powerful. I admit that the first time I read through it I didn't understand but upon my second reading it made perfect sense indeed. You make some wonderful points in so few of words. Thank you for entering my contest.

  • Bob Fox
    October 20, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    poet

    My your words ring so true. Waste and greed.But we plant the seed of indifference and leave a huge hole in mother Earths heart. Tomorrows cild to suffer the burden. Great words of wisdom


  • swim.x
    October 2, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    !!!
    That is all I can say, in relation to how I felt about this poem. And those are positive !!!'s
    Congratulations and good luck in the contest.
    Chin up,
    Swim.x

  • Writing0Freedom
    September 25, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    That was beautiful and poignant and so powerful! This is a really strong piece of writing that has amazing imagery and a unique way of putting a very important message. You wrote this very well - I love all of it. I don't have a crittique because there's nothing I think should change. The title is a bit misleading but I understand its relation to the poem. Wow!
    YOu are a very talented writer!
    Thank you for entering! YOu are definitely a finalist!
    WritingFree


  • peregrin
    September 21, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Made me cry, but it is fantastic.
    I love it.
    So powerful.
    And paints such a picture.
    Brilliant!
    That is it,
    brilliant!

    Thank you for your entry!


  • Angelo di Luce gold member
    September 14, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    A powerful write
    It is true to say, Earth has not been invaded by humans only
    The golden race and the silver race came to pass before us as we are the iron race
    None of them destroyed Earth, as they were more refined
    After all Iron rusts and decates away and leaves behind an ugly stain
    Well done


  • Age of Rain
    September 3, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This is beautiful and meaningful all at once. A brilliant write of sentiments that I think should be close to everyone's heart.


  • Maxboy gold member
    September 3, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Wonderful, there are many things a person can take from this, one of those is Mother Earth. I feel, that she can with a blink, wipe the Earth clean of all we have done to her and start over. A few million years to her is nothing but a blink in time, she is patient, but she will do it her way.

    Thank You
    Love
    Don


  • LadyDementia gold member
    August 26, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This is a superb piece, flow, emotions, feeling, spot on IMO. A stunning read, thanks for entering and good luck


  • Childofserenity
    August 20, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    im not sure the words to give you for your poem. all i got is .. lovely. thank you for that poem.


  • AdamAdkins
    August 16, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Wow. I love the format of this. Nice to see people use rich text the right way.

    I really like the poem overall. the only thing I dont like is

    she called HIS name
    and her soul stirred
    as a single seed was planted

    ~and the healing began.

    because it seems to imply that god can fix what we destroyed. Like prayer can save us. Which I strongly disagree with... However, that doesn't take away from the actual poem, which is great. Just a slight conflict on veiws


    • mysticstorm gold member
      August 16, 2008
      Edit | Reply

      I appreciate...

      I appreciate your comment and view...yet mine is...MOTHER takes care of and gives birth to,FATHER (however you look at him is needed (children are not born by woman alone)...GOD, HIGHER POWER, BUDDA,ECT... are we both sexes?
      Thank you for the comment and preception...now you know mine...
      :


  • etoile
    August 14, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    ooh very intense i liked it alot.
    especially the italics

    We heeded to none
    as the humane race spread
    infecting her body,
    like a disease with no cure
    ---
    i love those lines
    goodjob on the bronze !


  • PatheticKt
    August 12, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Oh, wow! Bravo at this poignant piece! I especially love what happens in every action written here ^^ Definitely moving, indeed . . .
    . . . ok since you want a critique, well, I'll try my best:
    To be honest, I am not sure if the title suits with this poem because I think, the title's somewhat a first impression so maybe change it to something powerful yet subtle like this write you've got here But hey, it can remain if you want since it's not that much of a big deal ^^'
    Well, yeah, that was my critique I just love the theme behind this with hope, society and the Man Above mixed into this poem; it made me simply speechless- it's that amazing


  • Boson Higgs
    August 4, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Is that background the Eiffel Tower?

    It is a beautiful engineered piece of work, but I've been drinking, so I am more likely to be positive in my critique...

    If I had been sober, who knows what I might have said??


  • Room without doors gold member
    August 4, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Outstanding

    I liked this a lot. You create layers of meaning and the poem really built to a finale. This has some great imagery I especially liked the lines:
    flooding land and seas
    shifting lives structure
    but there are many others that stand out. The metaphors are very strong and well-chosen. I thought this was creative with a lot of originality.


  • Avatar of Innocence
    August 1, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I am just a little offended with this poem. As a feminist, what makes one think that the earth is a feminine embodiment, and that in order to heal itself it must call to a higher (perhaps) masculine (christian) deity to repair itself.

    To play devil's advocate (ha ha to myself) what if the earth really was a feminine entity? Would she really need a masculine counterpart to ease the pain or replenish herself?

    Just a few thoughts. Good poem in and of itself, though the last stanzas threw me off. Thanks at least for getting my attention and reminding me to think.

    Your turn


  • Reptile Lady gold member
    August 1, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Wonderful write your words express so much
    Powerful stanza's
    A perfect image set in the voice of thought
    thank you and best wishes to you in our contest
    Julie


  • edit my world.
    July 29, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    oh my gosh this is beautiful...everything just flows so nicely. my gosh...critque on what? this is amazing...wow...this clearly is the best poem i've read at 5:15 lol

    Good Luck in your contests
    Dani♥


  • Catie Sheeran gold member
    July 24, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    OH this is outstanding ...Im speechless...just perfect....OMG I love every word of this...don't change anything!!! beautiful... good luck


  • poeticweaver gold member
    July 23, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Powerful,

    Through all the wrongs, and things many overlook, or just don't care until it's just tooooo late... It's those final moments, where one can truly appreciate a single seed of hope, a plea answered in kind, so in time, the healing can take place. You are much like that little seed, for you carry many blessings within your verses. Thanks for sharing your sweet soul!

    Peace, Timothy


  • warrior-eagle
    July 23, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Wow.
    Your writing in a way reminds me of mine,
    specially that healing part because once
    I wrote about healing tears. And this
    just reminded me of how sometimes
    in order to be healed we must be broken first,
    and in order for the good to come out,the bad
    must come out through brokenness.

    ...Simply Me♥


  • afroqueen
    July 23, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Wow, great imagery. I like the way you end it, as though the Earth comes full circle. Good luck


  • Grey Mouser
    July 22, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Awesome!

    Your imagery and powerful depiction of the "humane" race spreading like a disease across the face of the world, Mother Earth, and not heeding her warnings, shows a true understanding and compassion that is above the normal for us "humane" beings. Magnificent write sweetheart, best to you.

    Love,
    Mouser
    xoxoxoxo
    Sun and stars shine no brighter than you!


  • maralisa silver member
    July 21, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    in a universe once filled with hope screaming in silence,
    she called HIS name and her soul stirred as a single seed was planted and the healing began.wow beautiful good luck in the contest


  • kiwigirljacks gold member
    July 21, 2008

    Edit | Reply


    Speechless! This is outstanding!! I can't believe you got that from that pic, I got nothing looking at it!

    Oh what we have done to this earth! Yet the cycle of life sprouts anew.

    on this one sis!!


  • DragonBlood
    July 21, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    very nice very nice the flow was great and written exelently

  • Ulimate
    July 21, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    *CLAP*

    Well done, i particularly like the "like ants under feet of giants" line. The whole read just flowed very nice.


  • rollingzen
    July 21, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    and....we thought we were poets


  • Lexie -
    July 21, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    what can i say other than CONGRATS! on yet another victory
    this is a piece of brilliance that just held with a vice like grip untill the end!
    very very well written


  • DeathsUnholyAngel
    July 21, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    (y)

    This is an amazing poem, the structure really adds effect and as its on its own, it makes it mroe prominent, so you feel the pain.

    Nika X


  • ShaShay
    July 21, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Great job. I loved your metaphors. Great word choices. Pen on...


  • Angelflower
    July 21, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I really loved this!!! it's just so amazing really!! the imagery was just so vivid and detailed! it really shocked me!! The emotion in this was heartfelt and strong as well.. there were moments while reading this that I could relate to in weird ways you truly did a wonderful job... I wish you the best of luck!!


    Angel


  • SoldiersRain
    July 21, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This is so depressing...but I love it. As I'm sure everyone says and you've heard a million time, this is fatally gorgeous. I love this piece more everytime I read it. Extremely well done. The emotions shine through in a misty light. Great write.

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