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You and Me

Sometimes I study myself,
My own reflection.
I focus on my every feature.

The friz, the acne,
The unperfect smile,
The under bagged eyes,
The odd shape
Of my short,
Whale like body.
A stomach that's too big,
Thighs that don't separate...
The disgusting thing that is me,
The objectionable blob I've become.

And then, I look at you,
Really look at you.
I study your every feature.

Perfect hair.
Curls. Bounce. Shine. Body.
Layered just the way
It should always be.
Perfect face.
Clear skin. High cheek bones.
Mesmorizing eyes. A blinding
Bright white smile.
Perfect body.
Shaped just right.
Not too fat. Or thin.
Neither short, nor tall,
Just right.
Legs, perfect sized,
With thighs which would never touch,
Unless you wanted them to.

And I wonder,
Why can't that be me?
I've done all I could
To actually like me.
Now, I think I give up.
You're popping up
More and more.
And you look at me
Like I am repulsive.
And it's then I realize,
It's you're fault.
I am not comfortable in my skin
Because you won't let me.
Pressured constantly
To look like you
Could only make me think
That looking like me
Could never be appealing.

What's a girl to do?
I'm stuck in a world of pain,
Confusion, and misery.
I see no light at the end of this tunnel.
I think it's time
For me to jump off the tracks.

I'm off.
I think I quit...

Author notes

not too much of a poem. rather, a rant. just me venting. what else can i say? i hate myself lately. my self esteem is gone. idk what happened, but im disgusted with myself.

i want serious feedback and comments. be honest. what do you think?

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Comments


  • XFaLLen-StarX
    July 20, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    what i -honestly- think?! i think that NO ONE is satisfy with themselves! that's sure nd certain! even the person that thinks of himself as "the greatest hit" will see crap in the mirror ..
    most people feel really better when they see someone desperate in front of them .. u bein ugly or beautiful doesn't make them feel any better or any worse, wut make them feel better is YOU thinkin abt urself as someone ugly .. think of urself as beautiful nd u'll BE beautiful, nd then watch how many ppl would b jealous!

    just give it time!

    PS i would've never chose u to b my italian sister if i haven't thought of u as beautiful inside out (honest)

    me
    xxx


  • Lone Defender
    July 18, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    If you want my opinion ...you're a gorgeous creature. If you don't want my opinion, then it's still a great poem. Nice work, stranger.