Aching and sore
I cannot imagine why you hurt me.
All the pain I’ve endured
gets even worse when I shut my eyes
because whenever I sleep
I see you on replay in my head.
I was crushed when I caught you with her;
Were all those words you told me nothing but lies?
I’ve spent hours trying to figure you out
but I’ve never succeeded.
& I have to stop pretending that you mean everything you say.
Your cologne invades my lungs
stopping me from breathing
& when I start to choke
you hit me hard thinking it’ll help,
but it just pushes your lies deeper into my body
& I faint from all the pressure.
I wish I could turn back time,
maybe then I’d be able to understand you.
You were my knight in shining armor
until you let me be locked up in my tower
guarded by dragons and your sharp tongue.
I swallowed the ring you gave me,
thinking it was one of my pills
& it went down so smoothly I could’ve sworn
that all the screaming I’ve done in the past
expanded my throat.
Maybe it’s a sign that you’ll be within me forever
living in my mind like a parasite
that feeds on sorrow and broken hearts.
You can go to hell,
cause I’ll never be the same anyway.
Author notes
thunder.xx.paradise <-- thats me =)
"I'd rather chew on broken glass than
keep living in the past and waste my time
analyzing words i know you didn't mean."
In a list
A contest entry
- Quote Inspired [Round 2]★ by innocence jaded.xx.
800 points, ended September 4, 2008, 10 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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Thank you very much for being patient with me, and entering my contest.
Lines 15 - 17...very poignant imagery.
Lines 23 - 27...yikes! the angry agony is palpitating. -
This was some hard core sh**! Your author notes kick some mean arse all by themselves! Top notch write,and I hope you never experience this type of treachery again.
-
I love this, very powerful. wonderfully written and well explained. simple and straight to the point. Great job. Good luck in my contest and keep up the good work!
-
WOW.
so powerful. lovely write.
the subject matter is saddening... but you did an amazing job at telling the story and expressing your emotions.
i am terribly sorry for your treatment. i hope you find someone that treats you better that your heart can love even more deeply than the one that hurt you.
lovely write. thanks for entering.
best wishes and best of luck. -
'You were my knight in shining armor
until you let me be locked up in my tower
guarded by dragons and your sharp tongue.'
and..
'Maybe it’s a sign that you’ll be within me forever
living in my mind like a parasite
that feeds on sorrow and broken hearts.
You can go to hell,
cause I’ll never be the same anyway.'
I lovelovelove those lines, they were so intense.
I love all of the imagery held in one piece, its amazing.
finalist [=
♥
-
Maybe it’s a sign that you’ll be within me forever
living in my mind like a parasite
that feeds on sorrow and broken hearts.
You can go to hell,
cause I’ll never be the same anyway.
that whole part was phrased so well!
this is one of my favorites by you.
BTW on the day i sent this (cause i know u wont get it for a while)
one of my poems was in the spotlight !!!! -
Awww, wow =) This is amazing. I loved every word. Sadly, I can really relate to this right now. This poem definitely hit home. You penned it so beautifully, and I loved how you portrayed that quote.
-I was crushed when I caught you with her;
Were all those words you told me nothing but lies?
...
Ughhh. Those lines pretty much say it all.
-Maybe it’s a sign that you’ll be within me forever
living in my mind like a parasite
that feeds on sorrow and broken hearts.
...
Damn, woman, hahah you are so good with freaking imagery and metaphors and EVERYTHING. I love your poems =) Keep writing love & thanks for entering ! Good luckkk♥
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Your cologne invades my lungs
stopping me from breathing
& when I start to choke
you hit me hard thinking it’ll help,
but it just pushes your lies deeper into my body
& I faint from all the pressure.
lmao that reminds me of a part from one of my poems
i love love love the last two lines & the stanza before it
AS WELL AS
Aching and sore
I cannot imagine why you hurt me.
All the pain I’ve endured
gets even worse when I shut my eyes
because whenever I sleep
I see you on replay in my head.
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