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mint julep swirl

Missing image
you toss your head and I swirl crimson,
spin into the green-eyed wonder
where the sun sets and moon rises

I close my eyes
and the sea waltzes
between the blues and a love song

enchantment waiting on the cusp of intensity
slides between you’re-no-good
and one-mint-julep rhapsody

Your memory comes to me -
I travel through your hair;
its sway, my pulse
shimmers

I hear a distant unanswered cry
and the tension is too beautiful

Author notes

http://littlemewhatever.deviantart.com/art/Behind-Your-Illusion-ll-63498745
"Mesmerizing" picture prompt
For an added dimension click => http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a8VU4m0lfoE&feature=related
Tommy Emmanuel plays "One Mint Julep"

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 8 of 8
  • carole21
    July 21, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    nice

    nicely penned for the prompt . . congrats on the trophy . .


  • Ithica silver member
    July 19, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This is one beautiful poem... It appears to me your skills are growing by leaps and bounds!!! Congrats. On the Silver!!! Well deserved...


    • marlene47 silver member
      July 19, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you, that was nice of you. I've been working on it... and there is lots here to learn from.


  • notorious gold member
    July 19, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Congrats


  • notorious gold member
    July 19, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    OH I LOVE YOUR TITLE!! It has a yummy vibe...LoL.

    Anyways..
    "and I swirl crimson"
    That is unique.

    "green-eyed stare of wonder"
    I can't help but wonder if this could be shortened to "green-eyed wonder"...just a thought.

    "and the sea waltzes"
    Very cool personification...I have to borrow 'waltzes' someday. (:

    "enchantment waiting on the cusp of intensity"
    I LOVE THAT!! 'enchantment' is sooo magical & 'cusp' is an even groovier word...I like 'intensity' as well, & in one line, that's awesome!!

    "Your memory comes to me"
    Wow--this is simple but so...evocative.

    "and the tension is too beautiful"
    Wow again...

    Anyways, good luck & thanks for completing this when you said you would (:

  • notorious gold member
    July 18, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    It's okay with me...but it better be damn good! (:

1 - 8 of 8