i want to ravage you
like a violent storm
something raw to leave you broken
so i can gather your beauty
and reflect it as my own
Comments
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the first two lines remind me of JP's work a lot. actually, the whole thing does. not necessarily a bad thing, i like this.
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Not bad.
Your words are great, just spice up the punctuation and capitalization a bit.
Good work though, picturesque. -
whoa.
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