Turning the corner
You glance past your shoulder
To make sure that the coast is clear
You make your steps light
As you run from your fright
And feel your heartbeat in your ear
But why do you flee
Something that you can't see?
Just face it and let free your fear!
Terror clouds your mind
And it's not far behind
And all of a sudden...it's here
While you try to hide
It swallows you alive:
The memories of the past years
And though I may try
To stop rain from the sky
You drown in your river of tears
Author notes
Yeah, this is probably difficult to understand first time reading. Here's a hint: you're not physically running. Basically, you're trying not to think about the pain you're in. At the end, my efforts to comfort you become in vain when you "drown in your river of tears" (start to cry). Sorry about the poorly written metaphor, guys. But, hey! I got this one published! =D
"Darkened Decadence"
drakothstheron
A contest entry
- Concept Contest... by grinlips.
400 points, ended July 18, 2008, 12 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Paint your picture in my mind_contest part one of four by drakostheron.
950 points, ended October 1, 2008, 24 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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Impressive!
Of all the poems I've read on your list, this is the most impressive. Most young writers struggle to write within controlled forms, but you've done a fantastic job. The imagery adds to your meaning without feeling "over the top," and the whole poem evokes a sense of anxiety. -
*i* could really identify with this one; but because i have a terrible fear of the dark - and the idea of going to a car late at night, i'd be watching over my shoulder too, stricken with fear that someone was about to come up behind me and attack/rape me. fab job on this!
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Thank you for your entry in the contest. An interesting poem dealing with a feeling we all have at some point in our lives. Congratulations on having this one published, may you have many more.
Good luck in the judging
Sue and Jeff
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this is a good poem, it was alittle bland and without the amount of imagery i like in poems but alas i do like it it was wrote well and with true emotion
all my love thanks for entering
kitty xxx -
I love "Terror clouds your mind"
Thnx for entering & Best of Luck
: F
GloriousGift
Heba -
This is quite descriptive of a certain disturbing state of mind, which can be immobilizing. You really can feel as if you are drowning in a river of tears.
Well done.
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wow i really like this and it isn't what i expected after reading the beginning. very good job and good luck.
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nice imagery./..sound like those dreams..when u see a tunnel..or when all u see is a single road ahead of u...kinda reminds me of robert frost..kinda dark..but pretty good..good luck in the contest
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well done
the imagry is quite clear, yet it still leaves the reader to ponder more on there own fear... it's great when a poem does that... plus this style is close to mine... so u might very well win this comp... Best of luck... oh and yeah plz read some of mine.. thnx again :-)
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