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joe, still stuck on yellow?

they say the color yellow
is a visual foe.
a sight that stops not only blood,
but the airflow,
makes spit hard to swallow
and
speech hard to follow.
your body may be strong,
but it's your mind that's lacking in
marrow.
maybe at some point
you were a bright schmo,
had it all,
perhaps it's the shell that got hollow
so when you
screamed
cried
laughed
shat
pissed
all you heard was the echo.
you might have had the right piece
but you're were still lacking in tempo.

you're poor joe,
but only because you're using sanity as escrow

Author notes

YELLOW HAS SCIENTIFICALLY BEEN PROVEN TO DRIVE A PERSON MAD. go figure.

A contest entry

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 8 of 8

  • AAA Taurus The Bull gold member
    July 25, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    Hi

    The colors of yellow is for wisdom


  • movedon
    July 20, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I strongly disagree! Sunshine yellow is my favorite color! jk. Well actually it is. It's a happy color. But anyway, lots of good lines in this. Interesting take on the contest prompt. I liked reading this!

    Warmest,
    Mylee


  • JennaSara-FreeSpirit
    July 20, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I think this is a strong poem.
    "a sight that stops not only blood, but the airflow" is a glorious line.


  • adios muchachos gold member
    July 19, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Dear Sam

    I never knew that yellow would drive you to distraction,
    but I do know that trying to catch a vacant taxicab on Park Avenue and 44th street at 4pm in Manhattan will drive you into one of those little bars and grills that dot that area. LOL
    I like your take on this contest!

    Sorry took so long to get here!

    John


  • bandgeek
    July 16, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    pretty cool

    kinda lost me in the middle of the poem but it was really cool. keep it up samm.
    love,
    the awesome MOLLY


  • Darkwell
    July 16, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    i love the words you use here killer

    feng shui sais that your kitchen should be yellow but not a real bright yellow like a nice like kinda creamy yellow. idk what thats gotta do with stuff here i just wanted to share

    this part kicked me right in my brain:
    a sight that stops not only blood,
    but the airflow,
    makes spit hard to swallow
    and
    speech hard to follow.

    awesome!


  • AliceinPoetryLand gold member
    July 15, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Wow I ddn't know this! What a very enlu=ightening piece you have written. Rather a few over the 50 words or less requirement, but a really interesing piece.
    Thanks so much for sharing
    gaylene


    • samm
      July 15, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      srrrys i forgot to count : /
      but thanks anyways :]

1 - 8 of 8