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Imagination's Flight

winds of word’s wanderings
wafting o’er seamless skies
soaring, shooting, scattered
like startled birds to wing
weave formations living
love songs echoing
ever orchestrated
our minds choreographed 
cherish themselves once more
mystified by sharing
something greater than gold
gratefully letting go

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Author notes

This is in Old English or Germanic alliterative verse. It is composed of hemistichs which any two consecutive meet the criteria to be a stich, so I call it a chain of hemistichs. Each hemistich is composed of six syllables and two "lifts" or highly accented syllables. The last lift from each hemistich must be an alliteration to the first lift in the next. Other alliterations are included in the non-accented syllables, creating a fluid continuous poetic structure completely without rhythm or rhyme.

Prompt: "Imagination bodies forth."

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A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 8 of 8

  • Lyndon gold member
    August 3, 2008

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    Ah! Hemistichal verse.

    Reminds me of the short lines before Duncan's murder or more properly of "Beowulf", especially Beowulf!
    Certainly, we do go on a flight of the imagination. For your readers, you did vary some hemistich lines a little from the fundamental rule you laid down!
    It was delightful to fly with the alliteration.
    The caesurae at the end of the odd numbered lines play well and do not lapse fully into enjambment.
    The theme is imagistically controlled and rhythm and alliterative, consonantal sound support this. You chose rightly, in my opinion, to keep all letters in lower case. Fluent work.
    Best wishes.
    Lyndon of the Winklings.


  • Mairi bheag gold member
    July 27, 2008
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    Ah, this is what you've been getting up to lately. When I see something as highly-constructed as this, I feel like I'm being led up the garden path (like with sprung rhythm); but if I delve, I see the structure you're playing with. I would much rather see the "fluid, continuous, poetic structure completely without rhythm or rhyme", and that's what I get when I read it aloud. I would find it more fluid without the capitals and //s - it would seem more organic. It's due a warren-full, though. Here they come.


    • PerVirtuous
      July 27, 2008

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      You can blame CJ for the caesuras as he tried to say that without them a hemistich was something else. Now that I have your OK to remove them, I shall. Ha ha ha. I tried to explain that in spoken verse the notation is irrelevant, provided the speaker knows how to read it properly. He insisted that two lines of text on the paper must always equate to two lines of poetry. Unfortunately, the dictionary, encyclopedia and the brilliant arguments of yours truly were not enough to convince him. Some people are so smart they can see around facts to the truth! Ha ha ha. Thank you for your kind words.

      • Mairi bheag gold member
        July 27, 2008

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        The first time I came across a caesura was in Latin verse. There, no way was it signalled by a couple of slashes - the language of the verse, in the hands of the poet, indicated where it was, the place in the line indicated where it was. Lord alone knows why anyone would insist that you mar your verses with a couple of parallel lines! What better "caesura" is there anyhow than the end of a line?

        As we discussed re your French sonnet - that's where you breathe!


        • PerVirtuous
          July 27, 2008
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          Now that you have added your two cents worth I will consider the matter closed! Thank you.


  • kiwigirljacks gold member
    July 15, 2008

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    I'm going with what Amera said too!
    *runs screaming from forms* lol

    And I agree.. that is something greater than gold!
    to your talent!


  • rhondasail
    July 15, 2008

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    What she said(Amera rules!)...lol...I haven't a clue as to the mechanics, all I know is I like the stuttery flow and alliterations...the musical sound as I read it aloud. I know it will do quite well in the contest...Peace, Rhonda


  • Amera gold member
    July 15, 2008

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    Impressive! Few people know the correct usage of cæsura in metered verse. This poem flows like magic and out plays the prompt a thousand fold. You penned it in wonderful alliteration in formal hemistichs. I’d like to point out that you used both types of caesurae: masculine and feminine. A masculine caesura is a pause that follows a stressed syllable; a feminine caesura follows an unstressed syllable. Another distinction is by the position of the caesura in a line. Initial caesura describes a break close to the beginning of a line, medial denotes a pause in the middle and terminal occurs at the very end as you used the latter. Initial and terminal caesura were rare in formal, Romance, and Neoclassical verse. Your poetry is filled with a wealth of inspiration for your readers here on AllPoetry.

    Love,
    Amera♥

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