Born under a black sun and a crimson blood red moon. People on their knees curse the sky. Shoving their fists in the air, they scream out why?
Wondering why the security they were promised was all just a lie. Even the holiest of holy get cut down and die. While the ones they leave behind pray to ascend up high.
To their names blasphemized, the gods turned a blind eye. From the innocent faces that wail and cry. All are jaded by the nothingness inside.
Leaving them cold to the fact that they all deserve to die. So they do what comes natural to mindless fools stuck in a state of panic. They rob, rape, and pillage the meek, in desperation their mania wreaks.
Author notes
Some edits performed By EA
A contest entry
- Dark by Luckintheshadows.
525 points, ended July 16, 2008, 13 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Imaginary by know one.
750 points, ended August 29, 2008, 109 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Rapture by WithoutWings.
500 points, ended September 30, 2008, 10 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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Thanks for entering my contest. I like the ideas, and the message of this piece, but for me the execution of them could be a little bit better. Overall good though, and good luck in the contest.
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nice use on internal rhyme,thanks for entering.
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Yes, it's much more coherent and readable now. I like what you've done with it! Good going - All the best.
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I happen to think that what you wrote here was excellent, and with your permission I would like to incorporate a few of the changes you made in to this piece. Please let me know.
Alex
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Excellent! I really enjoyed your write, I love the questions you ask...and you speak of society with great wisdom really, your last stanza speaks nothing but a turth that sadly, the majority of our race seem to indulge in....
Thanks for sharing this, and for taking the time to enter my contest,
Luck.
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