Curled in a ball on the floor,
in the corner, scared to run for the door.
My daddy is shouting hurtful words about me,
im to scared to get up, get out, flee.
Im gunna take a chance and hope for the best,
I get up and run and feel a hard punch in my chest.
Its him he caught me, oh god help me,
he threw me onto the floor, down to my knees.
He punshes he kicks, so hard for him to resist,
he thinks i dont get it, how he lashes out and hits.
Why do you hit me? Am i really that bad?
Why do you hate me? Your suppose to be my dad!
I cry at how painful he can be,
this is the day my daddy killed me.
so much tears so much pain i look at my life, he drained,
So young yet so dead no more life to live.
A contest entry
- Titles/ Rhyme only by piccola.
600 points, ended July 14, 2008, 19 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - The Best of AP by ageofdarkpoets.
450 points, ended October 6, 2008, 33 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Your favourite poem! by forbidden-colour.
550 points, ended July 8, 141 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - freewrite--but i perfer dark, emo anything goes by foreveryourslove.
550 points, ended September 6, 76 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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wow this is a very sad write i understand what you are going through i was abused by my entire family though my mom my step dad and it hurt i didnt feel loved it was really bad so i ran away and found a way of safey loved your poem so goode luck in my contest....and thanks 4 entering
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Thank you for entering,
Child abuse, a category of poem, I was not expecting in this contest, though it is called "your favourite poem!"
I found this piece wonderfully disturbing.
Thank you for entering
Kind regards
Sophie
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This is really sad any abuse that is giving is not deserved by anyone people will never understand what they do to others thanks for sharing
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I dont know if this is true but if it is I pray for you
The poem is well done and very believeable One so young should not have to go through this but death is not the answer.Get help out side the
home. thanks for your kind comment on my poem God bless -
this is just upsetting.
i understand what abuse is like but this is really sad.
i like the first three paragraphs but the last one didn't have the same feeling, i guess cause your daddy hasn't killed you yet.
but non the less a good write.
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What the hell...
I dont know how a dad could do this to her daughter,
I can tell the physical pain hurts but the emotional pain is even worst.
This poem is just honestly brutal
and thanks for shaing this part of your life.
All the best to you
p.s thanks for dropping by and commenting
Ken
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AODP - This is quite a sad one. I have no other words so say. I'm sorry this could even be a thought.
But a good write nontheless. Wonderful.
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I am pleased to tell you not all Dad's are this way, mine was marvellous, and I have never hit my kids (well not on purpose I dropped a large piece of flooring on one of them once ) but back to poetry, you are making a really good start here, I don't want to advise you of anything that would influence you in any particular direction. So what I will say is, always read your poetry aloud, and LISTEN to your voice, read lots of other poetry, the sorts you like and the sorts you don't really like, and read that aloud too.
And remember poetry is fun, huge fun! So enjoy it!
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Reminds me of my childhood
I and my brother youngest to me were hit and slapped by our military father. As soon as we were old enough we left. This poem is very good! Keep up the great work!
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I want to go to your author page so I can see your age. This is sad and compelling. The rhyme is good but you could work on the flow, and there are some spelling mistakes. If you want to edit, there's time. Also if you used stanzas or some kind of line breaks I think it would give the piece more strength.
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