That summer
was hotter than ever before
and so
were you
I sat at a desk
as you lazed
on the grass
short skirted
and flirted
The day before
it had been me
today it wasn't
It never mattered
at seventeen
hot
is
HOT!
Author notes
I should have been working towards A levels but BLIMEY in 1976 skirts were short and summer days were hot and long.
In a list
A contest entry
- man it's a hot one by Cat.
1500 points, ended July 20, 19 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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ah summer is hot right now - though we have had lots of rain it is now warm and kicking - i used to like freeverse when i was just starting out and not knowing the ways and i still do some here and there but i am not a big fan of it but this was a pot luck clicking into - so i will stae my thoughts without giving a hard time.
ha, we all like love and fancy and when gals go short waht can we do but admire! i can not recall being seventeen, i can recall being drunk from 13 to now - it's all a bloody blur
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I rarely FV, I am frankly not good at it, but learning to express oneself in this economical fashion has to be good practice for packing extra punch in form, every comment is valuable, and I'm sure you've managed a few moments of sobriety along the way ...
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i think i can only echo mary's comments here...
a good entry here, thanks...
al -
this is a cute little romp- some
extra imagery might have set this piece up
a bit better but that said- i did enjoy the tongue and cheek feel
of the end and the way the poet
didn't attempt to take himself
too seriously
and allowed us to laugh along with his observations
so cute!
thanks so much for entering- it is good to see you here
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I like this as it's filled with imagery and emotion. I do wonder; can you really remember back to when you were seventeen?
Love,
Amera♥
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It's not THAT long ago is it?
We used to park the ox-cart outside the school, write with lumps of chalk onto slates and we had a very old teacher, his name was ...
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Great free verse!
Hot is right...this is!
Regards,
DeGraw
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excellent! your fv is on fire...hot
Love, Lane
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Luvit.
The opening line/verse shows you had your priorities straight.
Tom
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