Intro
I have walked outside the walls of heaven, only to plunge toward the fiery pits of hell. Woken in times unknown, only to drift and dwell in a purgatory cell. Faces, voices, cry through winter nights, "Listen little boy, we've got a story to tell."
A Voice
It was a lesson in dying, losing you [psyche], only to find myself. Time has now worn away all vanity, torn the mask, the facade I once played. Though I prayed, you have not returned. Closed off, enshrouded within the walls I've built for myself. Inside, twisting, I writhe in mercury lined tears.
Silence
In the quiet recesses within my own mind, an iron cell. Fading strength, the crashing sea of melancholy seeks to crush the remaining life from this ego [me]. As darkness fades to light, when all seems lost, I rise, the phoenix - preparing for the final flight.
Acceptance
Memories, life and persistence have returned. Though my body broken, slowly I unwind. Falling in to the wind, breathe in - endlessly - the final embrace, I find myself floating toward the quiet place.
Rebirth
I was born, lived, and have come full circle, only to be be birthed again. Today I walk inside the walls of heaven, knowing tomorrow might bring the race through the city streets of hell.
Author notes
This is a work in motion. I'm not even sure quite where I'm going with it but very little remains from the original. I'm going to strip it down because I have a different story to tell.
Prose - heavy changes to something I wrote June 4, 2005.
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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:-)
Brian this is so interesting...a great view of a grand journey. Polar opposites not only from one place to the next, but also within one place one finds dichotomy...and that sometimes never ends. Sometimes that's all one will end up finding no matter how hard they look for singularity in purpose or in heart.. i'm probably making no sense. It's late. Loved it and will be checking back to see what the finished product is. *hugs* Melanie
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I can see the evolution of the soul where remembrances transforms one for their fight as they continue on to the next life ahead of them!
Interesting perspectives!
Keep penning on one stroke at a time!
Bill
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So let's see, I'm keeping in mind that you may still be working on this. My comment is just going to be a general expression on what it made me feel. The expression itself is strong rooted in transcendence. You have these little moments where you present very clear and direct interpretation of yourself. No shutter to block the light, it just is. You present the images in a very congruent manner. Not once did it seem like you had something unimportant to announce. Of course life is a series of fragments, the good and that bad, but this is more than that. This is the little thing along the way. Things people usually miss.
I mean how many people actually try to understand the working of the self? Or at least present them in a clear and direct fashion? Not many I'm sure. Some would be scared of what they may find. I'm not sure how this will change, become. What you have is very solid regardless and I think the thematic elements are circular and very telling.
Honest work Brian.
;
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Beloved Friend ...
Thank you so much for your words on my Author page ... I am glad that you returned to share the changed Brian. I see the cycles of process and of progress in this write. The realism of a poet. For how can one be hopeful and dream, if one cannot see reality?
I loved the way you presented this. I loved the stripped-ness of it all. After I stripped away all masks of the self, people started to accuse me that I am "not real" ... How ironic! I wish to give to you a more tender applaud for being brave enough to look into your own mirror. You are so special.
One suggestion: perhaps you may consider a second Voice in the second half of the write, almost as an echo. But, as I say, it is only a suggestion. I like repetition, and I thought perhaps the Higher Voice could reply? Or even the Inner Voice (which is the same, but more individualized), to reinforce the transcending?
Nevertheless -- should you change it please let me know ... I am saving a copy of this ...
Love
Myra
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You have no idea how marvelous it is to see something new. I will comment on this properly after I get up. Sleep is calling me at the moment. I'm just so glad to see you put something up...Even if it was originally written in 2005.
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