Once, above the world so high
I built a castle in the sky
With dreams for stone and hopes for brick
I danced behind those walls so thick
And thought myself to be your King...
A fool, I never knew a thing
The storms of life would howl and wail
With hellish winds they did assail
And I would from my windows peer
It's warm and safe and dry in here
For far below I see the rain...
A fool, I just denied the pain
Reality then paid a call
The Castle shook, the walls did fall
The broken hopes and shattered dreams
Came crashing down with wild screams
Of how and why and what to do...
A fool, for ever trusting you
Author notes
option 1
A contest entry
- Current mood swing: Clutter → Confusion → Chaos by Never Fall in Love.
1000 points, ended August 4, 2008, 12 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Loooove! :) :) :) by jamesbliss.
459 points, ended April 15, 147 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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Excellent Poem
Love this -- so smooth and delicious.


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Wow, what an opening
"dreams for stone and hopes for brick"
How did I miss all these poems first time round?
Amazing.

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I'm in awe of your poetry, your rhyme, your meter, just everything about your work rings of professionalism.
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Once again I am amazed by your poetic talent. This is the 3rd of yours I have read but it's off to add you to my favs. Your rhyme schem and flow are exceptional. The imagery was amazing. You put so much emotion into your poems and I absolutely love that.


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Excellent rhyme - excellent flow and god, that last line is a killer - and perfectly said.


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Pleasant rhyming, great flow, wonderful choice of metaphor and wonderful use of it, too. An excellent poem, or so I think.

1 - 6 of 6




