She dances to the beat of the blaring music,
Hungry eyes are watching her every movement.
She’s the whore and the tease,
At least that what everyone believes.
She’s nothing more than plain white trash,
A dime a dozen on this dance floor bash.
Her body moves in such a pleasing manner,
And every female’s pissed at her.
Their men are watching, hypnotized,
As she winds and grinds with closed eyes.
No one understands she’s trying to lose herself,
In this sweltering body heat, she’s hiding more than she’ll ever tell.
Pain and suffering are her norm in life,
As she lives in a maelstrom of strife.
Silent Tragedy after Violent catastrophe always repeats itself,
But she doesn’t know how to ask for help.
She’s lost as she’s hiding in her mind,
In the Midst of the lusting body grind.
She’ll dance just to feel alive,
To reassure herself something is left inside.
And when the music dies down,
She’ll finally sit and frown.
What’s the use in pretending,
When she’ll never have a happy ending?
Every eye that watched her dance,
Just wants to get into her pants.
Every lusting cock and tongue,
Just wants to know in the end they won.
Nothing is worth anything anymore,
And that’s when the bloody knife will drop to the floor.
Her life’s blood begins to pour,
And suddenly the whore will be no more.
Author notes
Eh.. You know the drill when it comes to personal experiance poems. Just something that I felt at one point, but I write poems when that happens instead of actually doing it. Heh.
A contest entry
- Ecstasy of Movement by MortalPhoenix.
700 points, ended July 30, 2008, 15 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - For my favs by crazymomma.
410 points, ended July 15, 2008, 23 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 12 of 12
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hey baby this is amazing
so strong so sure and im very glad you only write not do what you write
you are my daughter
i do the same thing well used too that is
love you congrats on your gold and hm you deserved it -
I love it omg it was sooo good great write.... reminds me of a few of my friends and even me at one point in my life... <3
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WOw, this is spectacular. No wonder you won gold on this. Amazing job. "She's lost as she's hiding in her mind"... Great line.
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Beautiful, this has so much emotion in it. I think the rhyme could be done without in a few places, but overall it flows exceedingly well. The story you paint here is a painful one, well penned, you definitely deserved that gold!
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this is a great write
full of vivid imagery and emotion
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Technical first; consider lengthening forth line of second stanza to match the third better.
Second, communication is such a crude tool; and we all just want to feel alive...
Cared about- loved.
The message of the dance, is lost on the observers, who judge, a reasonable judgement based on normal understandings and norms, and how body language is interpreted.
Only a very sensitive and caring soul could see the cry for help.
Dancer, needs to learn how to ask for help, and that can be dangerous, too.
Believe in yourself, and that hapiness will come. -
you write with feel. i like that.
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This is very wonderfully writting, the rhyming is excelent and the emotion that pours through your words is beautiful. Your words are strong, I like a poem like that. The rhythem is perfect as well.
Great job, deserving of the trophy!
-Kaela
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You write with a lot of passion. I like that.
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Very good imagery and descriptiveness in this piece. I have know people who were this way just hoping and wishing to find anything even close to resembling love. Nice poem. Thanks for entering
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I love this. I can relate to parts of it and that makes me love it even more. It sounded a bit awkward in a few areas but I am rendered speechless by this poem.
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I think this is what becomes of those who have been abused sexually. I like the honest emotion in this. The imagery was vivid and sad. Great write! momma 2
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