hey mirror. you coward.
sometimes i wish upon your smile
and hope that beauty is on the inside.
here's to the day when i hate the way i look.
here's to a second chance at dying.
here's to everyday since middle school.
and angst became my only constant obsession.
here's to lovers that came and passed.
here's to millions of tiny pieces of shattered glass.
here's to standing alone in the kitchen at home.
wishing that for once i would be normal.
here's to the adrenaline rush of pain and feeling good.
here's to blade-meets-skin and depression-sets-in.
here's to the smiling face of anorexia that encouraged me.
and helped me to feel happy about my image
as i ran through the woods like i actually had energy.
and everyday i get those insecure safety pins in my heart.
here's to losing faith in angels and turning out the lights.
here's to lying in bed until the world pushes me over.
i hate the world.
i remember drinking until the pain was tolerable.
i remember cutting until the pain was enjoyable.
i remember starving until my weight was in exponential decay.
the music died and i pressed fingernails through my eyes
like i was broken.
i've had a broken heart.
it's funny how i still love the girl who crushed it.
i still look at her like she's an angel.
i shut out the sunshine.
what do i think of summer?
last summer was amazing.
i fell for the girl i'd been thinking about
for the past two years or so.
and she hasn't broken it since.
i remember staying up nights
to write about how she is my only true love.
actually, i still do.
here's to the pain of not knowing myself.
here's to lovebites and daydreaming.
here's to the pain that makes us happy.
here's to love.
Author notes
inspired by the melody of the band "wishes on a plane."
http://www.myspace.com/wishesonaplane
comments?
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
-
That was a great write!
The inner pain pulsed through with such bold courage!
I liked the way you formatted it..it captured and pulled
us in at full attention!
I hope you hear the Powerful STRENGTH and COURAGE
that flows out of your inner soul...truly amazing,
and whoa...when you find your "inner moonbeam"
what an impact you are going to be to behold!
ears/Seattle
There are dear poetess..so many ...so VERY many
who are struggling for "someone" to understand,
what a relief YOU would be to hear their souls fight
courageously to hold on!
. Rewarded 8
-
that was good. i can relate to those feelings very well. except for the in love bit. everyone loses me there. but it is a very powerful and moving poem. good work.
. Rewarded 4
-
I love this poem. Its sad and beautiful all at the same time. Keep writing.
-
wow, this is wonderful and emotional
great write and keep it up!
take care, stephanie ♥ -
Great
This is filled with taut emotion
This is packed with a vivid portral of the struggle of being normal
love the lines "i remember drinking until the pain was tolerable.
i remember cutting until the pain was enjoyable.
i remember starving until my weight was in exponential decay.
the music died and i pressed fingernails through my eyes"
powerful and amazing.
. Rewarded 6
-
Is it intentional to use I in the lower case throughout? Like the use of repetition - sometimes htat can become tedious but here it's used for effect as if you are creating a toast to your sense being and the pain you create.
To be honest this isn't really something I'd choose to read in general but I found your writing quite moving and the work technically quite sound.
-
-
of course it's intentional to use "I" in lowercase (unless writing professionally.) lowercase symbolizes going unnoticed.
-
-
that's sooooooooooooooooooooooooooo good. I havent heard the melody yet but it is so good.
xoxo heva
Adding your comment:
1 - 8 of 8
