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Words

I want to write words
that will tie your mind in knots
and make your heart skip a beat
I want to form lyrics
that catch your ear
and make you move your feet
I want to create a story
that brings you to tears
but makes you cheer at the end
I want to weave a tale
that will trap you in its lines
like you've been placed under a spell
I want to make you feel comfortable
like you're sitting at home
in a place you can't see or touch
I want to open the door
to a place you thought
could never exist
I want to put into words
all the things people wanted to say
but didn't have the courage

I want to write...

Words are fires
They can be warming
And used for good
But they can also destroy
A word is more than,
a group of conjoined letters.
A word is more than,
an uttered sound.
Words have power,
of unimaginable strength.
A bullet can kill you once,
words, once, a thousand times over.
Still your heart beats,
but you feel the pain.
Words will build a man up,
till he tastes the clouds,
and touches the stars.
Words will tear a man down,
Untill he tastes his tears,
And feels the ground.
Words are no mere sounds,
they are songs.
Some kind, and pleasing to the ear.
Some cruel, and crippling to the soul.
Words can shape, mold make good,
And still disfigure and break.
I want to write my own,
Words. 

A contest entry

Tell me if it doesn't make sense

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Comments

1 - 10 of 10

  • Hebz
    August 21, 2008

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    Happy Birthday--in 2 days

    WOW, simple amazing words made this this wonderful piece.

    Thnx for entering & Best of Luck

    GloriousGift
    Heba


  • crazymomma
    August 10, 2008

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    It is true that words are very powerful. I enjoyed this very much. The message was just wonderful. Thanks for entering and good luck


  • crivanea silver member
    August 5, 2008

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    interesting..this have been quite a few contest...i think u have the potential to write something better...from this poem it shows that u r talented..but perhaps still within ur comfort zone..try going outside the box..its not a bad piece..in fact..its quite nice..and while its not too original..its def. something we all think and wonder about..good luck in the contest


  • myusikah
    August 1, 2008

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    Spoken like a true poet

    Fantastic! I can't really say much on this, but...brilliant! Thank you so much for entering! Good luck!!
    -->pia♫♪

  • davidbetzer
    July 20, 2008

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    Thank you Choffetz Chaim. I wish you would have done all the things you said you wanted to, because then you would have made the finalist list.


  • ShannonLea
    July 15, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Yes, well... I love it! You're absolutely right, words are more than sounds or letters. You've expressed yourself REALLY well. This poem has a simple beauty to it. Love it
    ~cheers


  • HeavensDaughter
    July 12, 2008

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    Wow...this is some poem. Powerfully written! Very expressive. I love it. Congratulations on the Honorable Mention. It is well deserved.

    This flowed really well. I really like the imagery used.


  • Florida Sunshine
    July 12, 2008

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    There is power in words, words have driven hearts and nations. It has lift some to inspire beyond the realm and destroyed others sending far below the ground. There is a magic words have to offer.

    I was quite surprised to scroll down to the comment box--passing authors notes & contest entries to see you are only 12 or under.  It makes this write all the more impressive.

    "I want to open the door
    to a place you thought
    could never exist
    I want to put into words
    all the things people wanted to say
    but didn't have the courage"

    and

    "Words have power,
    of unimaginable strength.
    A bullet can kill you once,
    words, once, a thousand times over"

    The mind of someone under 12 thinking this way is amazing, such insight.

    My only suggestion for you to work on is removing the many "I wants" 1 or 2 of them in a long stanza isn't too bad, you've already indicated what your writing about; is what 'you' think, then it isn't necessary to repeat it. Repeating it halfway down, might be a good reminder you are conveying your wants and not someone else. [Unless your doing it for emphasis. But, I doubt that would be the case in this write since you want your emphasis on 'words' and the power they hold and not necessarily on you.]

     

    The second stanza shows the power of words and what they can do. Awesome job.

     

    Overall, I felt your words were beautifully said especially knowing they are written by someone that is 12 or under. I do see you developing into a famous writer or poet, maybe both.  Amazing...

     

    Thanks for entering the "passion" contest, I do appreciate reading your work, it was my pleasure.

     

    Best of luck to you,

    Florida Sunshine B)

    *star* *star* oh, p.s. your the first person who entered that has written that your passion is about writing. I thought for a bit and a little surprised since this is a poetry forum that no ones passion is poetry. -- Interesting isn't it.  :D ... Keep penning I'm looking forward to seeing more of your work in the future.   Also, I'm not sure if your aware of this website http://www.shadowpoetry.com/resources/wip/types.html  but its great showing you different types of poetry you may want to explore.  If you use any be sure to state what your using and give credit to the person whose your using.  Might want to be something you'd like to explore.

  • Sky Prince Ireland gold member
    July 11, 2008

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    I won't tell you if it makes sense or not because I don't believe in telling people those kinds of things about their writing. Each to their own. The point is you wrote it from inside yourself and that's what matters. Thanks for entering my contest. Good luck.
    Brian

1 - 10 of 10