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I can't get away from myself

the presence of a shadowed soul

merely seeking normalcy

  an empty shell that echos

  represents the remains of what was once a life

    this is my sadness

    trying not to let my world consume me

      instinctively needing to run

      attempts to detour the darkness that will soon follow

        realizing it could be much worse

        though I am living this

          I am easily distracted
         
          often disturbed

            resentful and burdened

            Excepting myself for who truly I am

              is often times impossible

              my presences annoys others

                making it hard for them to swallow

                Feeling defeated and conquered

                  I prepare to give up and flee

                  with only the love of a few holding me back
                 
                    I soon realized my pain will only follow

                    fantasies of a life unlike mine

                      longing to mask my true identity

                      I am no one special

                        Miss. Continuously Ignored

                        rather easily forgotten

                          I am damaged

                          I am replaceable

                            and that is simply because.........
 
                            I

                              am

                              only

                                Melanie

                     

             



Author notes

If you can't tell, I am severely depressed. The recent diagnosis of lyme disease has brought me some light, but I still feel like I live in the dark. I know things could definitely be worse, but I am weak at this point, and I can't help but wish I were someone else. I feel like I am losing who I am, and it scares me. I am safe...don't worry, I just am feeling dark tonight.

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Comments


  • kareneisenlord gold member
    August 3, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    very poignant! How intensely you express your deep emotions and desire to escape; only to realize that your "darkness" will follow you. This is so true of many of us. Sometimes facing that darkness head on is what frees us from it.

    I hope that you are feeling better; and you are very special. DOn't ever forget that. You are you; and no-one in this entire Universe is who you are. I would say that is very special!! thank you for sharing this with us. Karen


  • satan-
    July 14, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    I hate that feeling. Of not knowing who you really are, and the fear and anxiety it brings of how the hell do other people see you. I like the shape of your poem, it really emphasizes the downwardness of your words. I hope you feel better, and get up and over the horrible grasp of depression. thanks for entering!